Damn. This Vampire Bat Amulet Necklace looks pissed off. He’s all like, “I am soooo f**king ticked off right now! I don’t even know what to say right now, so I’m just gonna look all shouty.” Classy, but man that bat looks mad as hell. Somebody give that dude a sedative stat! Amulet? More like a damned-ulet! *High fives the indoor house plant next to me.* Okay, calm down bat. I’m wrapping it up. Stop yelling at me. No, I don’t just prattle on forever. You’re a real dick ya know that? Fine, I’m out. You need anger management. No, obviously you do NOT manage it well. Good day sir! I said good day!
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Tag: jewelry
Twin Peaks Necklaces – Wow Bob Wow
*Doing my little midget dance. Claps hands together.* “Kcor s’tel.” Aka Let’s rock! These Twin Peaks Necklaces will make you say WOW BOB WOW. I saw these and I was all like… BOOM. Season 3, Episode 8 mushroom cloud! Got a light? No? Well, at least you have a frog/moth creature in your mouth. That’s something. Sorry, I can’t even write this because I am just too stoked for the next episode. These necklaces come in several styles: BookHouse Boys, Resident of Twin Peaks, Owl Cave, Black Lodge and more. By the way, that doll you like is coming back in style.
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Gothic Black Rose Necklace With Bat Wings
This Black Rose Necklace With Bat Wings makes my heart all a flutter with the pitter-patter of bat wings. You might say that it’s the wind beneath my wings. Or above a pile of bat guano. Is it a bat or a rose? Is it a bat named Rose? I don’t have the answers. I just know that it looks pretty damn cool. Look, I’m just winging it here. It goes well with this Bat Skirt.
Alien Stud Earrings – The Truth Is Out There
These Alien Stud Earrings feature… the head of an alien stud. I mean, I don’t know the dude’s history with the ladies, but I know he scored big on Uranus last night. Boom! You walked right into that one. Actually you backed right into that one. MEGA BOOM! Third degree burn! Anyway, these aliens are for your ears, because the truth is out there. I’m just too lazy to look for it. Or paint about it.
Black Bat Gemstone Pendant
This Black Bat Gemstone Pendant looks pretty awesome. Give it as a gift to someone you are batty about. It is so classy and so batty that I’m squealing like a bat. Really I am, you just can’t hear me. You also can’t smell that fresh load of guano I just unleashed cuz I was so excited and couldn’t contain my bat-bowels. No worries, I promise to re-enact the whole thing when this blog goes VR and smell-o-vision, which will probably be about 2025. Wooo-hooo! I have at least that long to go without deodorant before anyone notices. Hey, why do all the house plants keep dying? Just one of life’s mysteries I guess.
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