Edgar Allan Poe Nevermore Brass Cuff Bracelet

Edgar Allan Poe Nevermore Brass Cuff Bracelet
Yo, where my Poes at? Girls who like Poe, I mean. You ladies are in for a special treat. I’m gonna cuff ya. Sounds kinky I know. It is. I’m gonna cuff you good baby. And just when you think you can’t take anymore, I’ll ask if you want me to stop. Then you’ll shout Nevermore. Don’t stop! Get your mind out of the gutter. I’m talking about this Edgar Allan Poe Nevermore Brass Cuff Bracelet.

Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary…. That’s some pro pros right there from a pro prose writer. Also, that is one sexy bracelet cuff.
Read more “Edgar Allan Poe Nevermore Brass Cuff Bracelet”

The Raven Book Umbrella: Get Wet Nevermore

The Raven Book Umbrella Get Wet Nevermore
Nevermore! Nevermore! This Raven Book Umbrella is based on Edgar Allen Poe’s book. I think it’s about a bird or something. Now it is an awesome umbrella. Everybody is raven about it! It comes in pretty handy when the weather is for the birds. It’s perfect for those massive storms where you are facing an Edgar Allen Down-Poe. I’m so rocking the wordplay today. And that’s good, cuz you guys have been raven-ous for it. Okay. Okay. I will do the wordplay nevermore. I was just (c)raven some fun.

Raven Ring

Raven Ring
*gets down on one knee. Pulls out the trusty old Raven Ring and presents it.* Nevermore!

Nevermore? What do you mean nevermore? You’ve never been more embarrassed? You’ve never been more disgusted at the prospect of a long life with me?

Nevermore!

Just take the ring. Do you have any idea how much this bird’s head cost me? You don’t love me?

Nevermore!

Screw it. That’s the last time I practice my Edgar Allen Proposal to a bird!
Read more “Raven Ring”

Edgar Allen Poe Pop-Up Book

edgar allen poe book
Just like Creepbay, Edgar Allen Poe is all about strange stuff. He’s been giving people nightmares for ages and he isn’t even a dentist or an employee of the IRS. Funny story: People used to think I was in the Edgar Allen Poe fan club. For awhile there I couldn’t go anywhere without somebody yelling, “Poser!” or “Look it’s that poser again! Piss off!” I’m flattered, really I am, but I have never been a member of the fan club guys.

Anyhow, this pop-up book called The Illustrated Edgar Allan Poe contains four unabridged tales from the master of the macabre, complete with scary pop-ups that will have you hiding behind the couch as your mom reads it to you. Not that that happened to me. I’m just sayin’. Dude writes some scary stuff.

Wow. Never noticed all the dust bunnies back here. Score! Found a floor gummi bear or as I like to call it, a Yeti bear. Gummis always wear jackets in cold places.
Read more “Edgar Allen Poe Pop-Up Book”