Tag: playing cards

Fifty Farts Playing Cards

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fifty farts playing cards
This deck of Fifty Farts Playing Cards detail the ins and outs of the fart world. Now you can be hip to all of the fart terminology and when you toot, you’ll be able to name that fart.

For instance you’ll abe able to identify the difference between a “one-cheek sneak” and a “smoke screen.” You’ll know when you let loose with a “snart” or a “butt-trumpet”. Me? I play the “mud harmonica”. No matter how you pass it out your blow hole, you’ll enjoy these cards and will be able to impress your friends.

SPAM Recipes Playing Cards

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http://www.perpetualkid.com/spam-recipes-playing-cards.aspx
SPAM. The magical meat. The more on your plate, the warmer your seat. These SPAM playing cards have recipes on them, so you and the rest of the guys can all make toxic SPAM farts on Poker night while eating SPAM treats.

I got a full house, “SPAM and Pasta Nachos” high.

Royal Flush here, “Baked Apples with SPAM King” is high.

What do you have Bob?

*Bob covers his mouth and runs for the bathroom*

Bob’s got diarrhea.

Me too, but I ain’t whining about it. Hand me another slice of that Lemon SPAM cake would you? These are the best cards ever!

Texas Wound ‘Em: Bandage Shaped Poker Playing Cards

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bandage playing cardsI have a full house, Boo-boos high. I have a royal flush, ouchies high. I have a pair of one eye’d kings…because they both got stabbed in the eye.

Fun for the whole family. These Bandage Shaped Poker Playing Cards combine two of our favorite pastimes, Poker and open wounds that need bandaging. How do you not already use these cards on your Poker night? They look like bandages, but are playing cards.

They were obviously designed by some kid who skinned his knee running away from a poker game where he just cleaned all the other kids out, cheating them out of all of their pop-rocks and pixie sticks and other uncontrolled diabetic substances. Probably wrecked his big wheel and when he hit his head, he came up with this idea. Of course his parents probably stole his money and so today he lives in a shack in Arkansas where he hits his head repeatedly on the wall, trying to strike gold again. Sad really.

Hoyle Slice 2 Pack Skinny Playing Cards

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skinny playing cards
WTH? Poker just got all anorexic with these skinny playing cards. These are the playing cards that you get when your wife is leaving you and taking half of your stuff. Sure, take the playing cards! You’re only getting half!

While this isn’t as strange as most of the stuff we feature, these skinny cards are pretty weird. How am I supposed to hold these and look cool? I guess they are good for kids with tiny hands. Mommy, I got a full house AND a poopy diaper.

X-Ray Playing Cards

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x-ray playing cardsX-Ray vision. All of the cool superheroes are doing it. Sadly, we mere humans don’t possess the ability. Believe me, I’ve tried. The X-Ray specs in the back of the old comic books don’t work. They just get you punched in the face by angry females.

If you want to feel like you have crazy awesome powers while playing a game of poker, try these awesome X-Ray Playing Cards. You can see through them, but your opponents can’t see what cards you have. They must be made with some kind of X-Ray voodoo magic.
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