So this Arizona man was eating his breakfast when he spotted the mother of all nightmare insects at his window. It is called a camel spider, although I call it “HELL NO! GET IT AWAY! GET IT AWAY! It is a mix between a scorpion and a spider, which is a fun fact. Scorpions and spiders need to stop f**king each other yo! Great, now I’m not gonna sleep tonight. Thanks spiders.
Read more “Get It Away – This Bug Will Haunt Your Nightmares”
Tag: scary
It Is Time To Unleash The… Kraken Corkscrew
Screw you Kraken. No… Corkscrew you! This Kraken Corkscrew will open your wine in the coolest way possible. By having a Kraken attack your bottle and eat the cork. He loves eating the cork. He’s more of a corken really. Hey can anybody help me open this wine bottle? I can. Summon the Kraken! It is the ultimate kitchen accessory. He Kracks stuff open. And don’t forget about the Day of the Dead corkscrew.
Liquorbrand Ouija Board Gothic Symbols Purse
Illuminati in da house! Shhhhhhh! We don’t talk about them. Ever. Anyway, this Liquorbrand Ouija Board Gothic Symbols Purse has all kinds of Ouija Board symbols and even an Illuminati eye in the center. Did I not just tell you to shut your mouth? Just talkin’ bout Shaft. I mean Illuminati! That’s it! We told you that the first rule of Illuminati is that you don’t talk about Illuminati. And you just keep blabbing on and on. Yeah, well you just talked about ’em. I’m just trying to make a point. You keep- Looks like we’re both out of the club. You son of a-
Gothic Ravenskull Headdress
This Gothic Ravenskull Headdress puts bird skulls on your own skull. Obviously this is what people are raven about this season, while others crow. Speaking of, I always confuse ravens and crows. I once asked my dad, “Why are ravens and crows different?” and he said, “Just caws”. Very helpful as usual dad. Ravenskull sounds like one of them Harry Potter houses that the sorting hat picks out for you. Like, if you really wanted hufflepuff, but got ravenskull instead. What the hell is hufflepuff anyway. Sounds like the name of a paint huffing clown under some highway bridge. Whatevs.
Vampire Cufflinks
Look at these twin Nosferatu heads. Those are some sweet Vampire Cufflinks. I’m assuming that rather than attaching them to your cuffs yourself, they just kinda bite down and do it themselves. Probably drawing some blood in the process. So that by the time you get done with your fancy event, you basically have bled out. I can’t decide if they are ugly or cute. Maybe both. Great accessory. Maybe bring some band aids with you.
They beat these Human Teeth Cufflinks.