Check out this Day of the Dead Corkscrew, looking like it’s about to do a cranekick, with it’s arms all out. A corkscrew like this makes it worthwhile getting drunk alone, while you color in your adult coloring book. I usually pass out with crayons in hand, and wine glass tipped over so everything is colored red. That’s my method. Seriously, that is one sexy corkscrew. He’s adorable! Hey, anyone that opens wine for me without drinking some is awesome.
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Tag: scary
Creepy and Just Wrong Political Swimsuits
Remember that Sexy Chest Swimsuit? Ewwww la la! Well, check out these Creepy Political Swimsuits from Beloved shirts. They got Trump for your bumps, Famous alleged muderess and liar Hillary Clinton, Bernie Sanders and Vlad the Impaler. I mean Putin. You are gonna look so sexy sporting these at the beach. Why get one when you can get them all and go to the beach as that weird group who does that sort of thing. Look what Trump’s chin does to your lady bits!
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That Exists – Weird Catnip Cat Toy Fetus
Yep, that exists. A Cat Toy Fetus. Great precedent to set. Now cats are going to want to play with fetuses all the time. They’ll be attacking pregnant women just to get at the cat toy they are carrying inside. Great idea. They are gonna give upon mice in favor of their new favorite toy. The fetus. Meh. Whatevs. I guess. At this point I just have a de-fetus attitude.
Also get this fetus for your wall.
Day of the Dead Sugar Skull Pillow Covers
Lay your tired skull on a sugar skull and get some rest. Then wake up on your stomach and see the skull staring at you face to face and scream. And keep screaming cuz that shizz is terrifying. Not as terrifying as waking up next to 14 drinks Becky, but still… Oh, 14 drinks Becky? Yeah, we call her that cuz you ain’t gettin’ with Becky till you’ve had at least 14 drinks. That’s when she starts to look real good. Then you wake up screaming. But that’s beside the point. Anyway, Becky just left after shaving her mustache and leaving a mini Hiroshima in my bathroom. The point is that these Sugar Skull pillow covers are awesome. That’s the point.
Alien Belt Buckle – I Want To Believe My Pants Will Stay Up
There’s nothing like an Alien Belt Buckle to get aliens hovering over your junk all day long. That way they can monitor your pee schedule and know whenever you pull your peen out and do whatever other sick experiments they do. Go ahead,collect your sick data, I don’t care. Imma be rocking a sweet belt buckle with your shiny heads all over it. This Chupacabra Belt Buckle is also a good choice.
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