This is a cool Gothic Spider Web Shelf, but I already have one. You know how I got it? I just don’t dust. That’s probably why I also have a Gothic mantle of dead bugs and a Gothic refrigerator with mold behind it. Do you think spiders will be drawn to this shelf? I would be if I were a spider. A pre-fab web already built, so I don’t have to wear out my spider-butt spinning silk? Sign me up.
Tag: shelf
Coffin Shelf With Hand Carved Spider Web Sides
What happens if you put an “elf on the shelf” on a Coffin Shelf? You get a dead elf on a shelf. But that’s beside the point. This Coffin Shelf With Hand Carved Spider Web Sides is great for your haunted horror home decor. I’m putting things on it that I want to take with me when I die. If it’s on the shelf, everybody knows I get buried with it. Right now I have a few bags of M & M s and some Kit-Kats on the top shelf. Basically, I’m buying two so they can just throw me in, slap them both together and I’ll have all my stuff. You gotta think ahead.
Screaming Skull Shelf
Check out this Screaming Skull Shelf. He’s all like,”PUT SOME BOOKS ON ME! NOW! DO IT NOW! I NEED KNICK-KNACKS! I NEED IT NOW!” Damn son, calm yourself.
Two hours later. *Trying to sleep with a pillow over my head. Listening to the screaming.* I NEED A FLOWERPOT FOR MY SKULL. DECORATE ME NOW! DO IT NOW! I HAVE BECOME ONE WITH THE WALL. YOU WILL NEVER BE RID OF ME. I NEED A SMALL VASE!
Two hours after that. *Ding-Dong* Hello sir, we got a report of screaming coming from these premises. *Points to the skull shelf on the wall.*
OFFICER, GET ME A FRAMED PICTURE. DO IT NOW. GET ME ANYTHING! I MUST BE COMPLETE! A FISH BOWL! NOW!
Why do you always have these problems sir?
*Shrugs* You know I like to buy weird stuff. This stuff is weird. Stuff happens.
MAGAZINE PILES! NEED! DO IT NOW!
*Cop walks in. Grabs some books off a desk and puts them on the shelf. Shelf shuts the hell up at last, breathing heavy and relaxing.*
I AM COMPLETE! *Shelf falls asleep, snoring.*
*Cop looks at me.* Please stop buying this weird stuff, sir!
Gothic Cupboard
This Gothic Cupboard is cool is you have your house decorated in a Gothic theme. I wouldn’t know what to do with it though. My house is more slothic, but thats cuz I don’t move around a lot. I don’t even have any goths to store in a Gothic Cupboard. Do you guys know anyone that sells miniature Goths? Yeah, I probably shouldn’t get into the highly questionable illegal miniature Goth market. Besides, little people in makeup isn’t my thing.
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Instant Cemetery Displays
Check this out! Boom! Instant Cemetery! Which beats dying and boom! Instant cemetery! These displays are ready to display for Halloween or just year long weirdness. 17 hand drawn tombstones for your mantle, with matching storage tin. They can be lit by candles or holiday lights. Pretty spooky.
Call me a gravedigger cuz I dig this all day long! Get one for yourself and play some creepy theremin music. The seller crafterella has several sets available.
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