
I hate it when zombies eat my cupcakes! This Cupcake Recipe book will allow me to fight back by giving me tips on defending my cupcakes from these undead hooligans. Wait. That’s not what this book is about. Is it? I guess not. Still, the A Zombie Ate My Cupcake Recipe Book will teach you how to bake all kinds of cool and fun zombie themed treats. But I’m not gonna bother, cuz a zombie would just steal mine. I know. I’ll just make extra! Wow, look at me problem solving like an adult. I’m adulting everyone! Look at me! I’m adulting! Now I’m gonna go color!
Tag: spooky
Cute and Glittery Skeleton Rabbit Enamel Pin

Leaping skeletal rabbits! What have we hare? I mean here. It’s a Cute and Glittery Skeleton Rabbit Enamel Pin. Reminds me of that time I saw an army of these things coming at me. It was the war of the Nyquil Overdose. I won, but barely and eventually woke up sweating and shaking under the couch, wearing a colander for a helmet with an ear of corn in my gun holster. I still have nightmares.
Still though, cute pin.
Tortured Souls Rings – Agonizing Accessories

Does wearing Tortured Souls Rings make you the devil? I have no idea. That’s one for a philosopher. What I do know is that if you wear a handful of these and start punching people, you are making tortured souls create other tortured souls and that’s pretty evil. Don’t do that. Just wear them and admire their torment if you’re into that kind of thing. That reminds me, my feet are hurting. I think it’s cuz I have some tortured soles in my shoes. Wait. I AM the tortured soul in my shoes. Man, that’s deep.
Ascending Evil Climbing Skeleton Wall Sculpture

This is some nightmare fuel right here. This Ascending Evil Climbing Skeleton Wall Sculpture is going to scare everybody this Halloween. Is that a skeleton climbing my house? Is he looking in my window? Oh man. I’m about to go all Die-Hard on this bag of bones. It’s on now buddy. You best get off my house! No? You’re not leaving? Okay fine! Then I’m leaving. *Packing some things* I thought you said you were gonna go all Die-Hard on him? I am. It’s hard to die if I ain’t here. Now excuse me while I book a hotel!
Bare-Bones Costume – Skeleton Lace Poncho

This Skeleton Lace Poncho is perfect for lazy people like me, who are too lazy to make a proper Halloween costume. Just wear this lightweight lace poncho over your clothes. One size fits all. It turns you into a skeleton, with skulls, and cobweb designs too. Just put it on and go get that sweet candy! I hope you get a ton of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups. Cuz I want ’em!