Mysterious Sterling Silver Owl Ring

Sterling Silver Owl Ring
Whooooo is that? Who? Who? It is the coolest sterling silver owl ring. That’s who. It is classically creepy. Owls are creatures of the night, swooping and gliding through by dark trees as they hunt their unsuspecting prey for a late night snack. Embrace your inner bird of prey with this beautiful ring! My, what big eyes you have! Huge eyes are one of the owl’s best features. These striking orbs can spot a tiny morsel from way high up in the air. Then they swoop down and their prey is eliminated. Beauty and brutality. Ain’t nature wonderful? Channel your inner owl with this cool ring and be the envy of owl your friends. I mean all. All your friends. Those eyes. So intense. Reminds me of my ex wife when she wants money. She doesn’t even need to wear one of these creepy owl masks. She was born with resting bird-of-prey face.

Yeah nature is all about beauty and death. Kind of like this site. If it’s in nature and it is cute, chances are it can kill you or at the very least injure you horribly. That’s why I steer clear of nature. I just don’t give a hoot.

Frankenstein and Bride of Frankenstein Sterling Rings

Frankenstein and Bride of Frankenstein Sterling RingsWith these Frankenstein and Bride of Frankenstein Sterling Rings, you have the world’s freakiest couple on your hands. Smash ’em together and make ’em kiss. Or fight. It’s all good. Franky probably cheated or didn’t take the trash out. Maybe he farted too loud. That’s just how relationships are. They’re gonna fight, so I say put one on each ring finger and let’s get ready to rumble! Talk about bumping uglies. *shudders* Just make sure that they kiss and make up. But not too much.
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Vampire Repellent Necklace

Vampire Repellent Necklace
Vampires hate garlic. That’s why I eat garlic bread every night of the week. Saved my life many times. Like that night I saw a shadowy figure and I hissed like a wild cat, spreading my garlic venom through the air toward him. Naturally, he retreated at the same time I continued on my way. That time it was just a reflection of myself in the store window, but still. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of bites to the neck. This Vampire Repellent Necklace will help too.

Vampires hate garlic and they hate garlic clove pendants. They won’t mess with garlic in any form. That’s why you never see any Italian Vampire chefs.

Pro tip: Always watch who’s buying the garlic products at the grocery store. That’ll tell ya who isn’t a bloodsucker. Anyone that does not buy garlic definitely needs to be followed home and staked. By a professional of course. Don’t try that at home.