So here’s the deal. A research team has developed this pill, which looks like some robo-turd and measures hydrogen, carbon dioxide and oxygen gases in the gut in real time. So it basically tracks farts. Me? I don’t need this pill cuz I track farts with my nose. Sometimes I even grade the fart on a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the smell of a festering corpse left out in the sun in a landfill and stuffed with cabbage. I don’t need anyone else to take this pill either cuz guess what? I smell your farts too. And that one guy two cubicles down is nailing the high 8 barrier today bigtime. I bet he felt the heat on his cheeks when he unleashed that last one.

Therefore your fart pill is useless. Wanna know if you have digestive issues? How nasty is your steaming fecal cloud? That’ll tell ya. The nose knows.

via CNet (Careful of their super loud and super annoying auto play video, which scared a magnitude 10 fartquake from my San Andr-anus fault cuz I had the sound way up.)