Accessorize with some cryptids. These Cryptid Monster Necklaces feature hand drawn images of the world’s most elusive monsters. For when you are in the mood to wear a Chupacabra, Bigfoot, The Jersey Devil or any of the other mythical monsters that roam our world, but remain in the shadows. Pro tip: The Jersey Devil is a guy named Earl who will overcharge you for a used car, with a body in the trunk, but you’ll take it anyway cuz you have to get the hell out of New Jersey.
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Author: Artemis Winterford
Horror B Movie Wine Charms
These Horror B Movie Wine Charms will let you know whose drink is whose. Or is it who’s drink is who’s? Stupid english language. Hey, you’re drinking my drink. Mine was The Blob! Oh, sorry. That explains why it’s filled with Jello. Yeah. Don’t even go near The Attack Of The Giant Leeches drink. That’s just nasty.
Never let them put their lips on your drink again. Germs are the true horror movie. Min your drink, otherwise you will be starring in Attack of the Burning Herpes.
Dragon Eye Pendants
It’s the… Eye of the dragon. It’s the thrill of the fight. Rising up to the challenge of our rival.And the last known survivor stalks his prey in the night. And… he’s… watching us all… with the eyeeeeeeeee…. of the dragon! Love that song. These sweet Dragon Eye Pendants from CharlieMorgon are watching you and watching me. There’s no telling what they see. Although masturbation is a high probability. Just sayin’. All I’m sayin’ is maybe put some black tape over the eye before you do the deed, just like you would with your webcam. It’s just good advice.
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Brass Hellcat Necklace
This Brass Hellcat Necklace is gonna raise all kinds of hell. It’s gonna scratch your furniture up, knock your drink off the table, sneak some catnip and get all fuzzed up, then lay down for 5 hours and start again. Wait, that’s my cat. No, this necklace is just an awesome piece of jewelry that looks ferocious and badass. Here kitty kitty. Stop biting me. Are you getting drunk on my blood again? Bad kitty! Sorry. Again, that was my cat.
Meowzers that is one cool cat. I’d scratch it’s belly if it had one, which is probably a good thing cuz it would just kick at me with it’s paws and rip my hand to shreds. This necklace is so good it will make you catatonic. Which would be a catas-trophy. Which isn’t the good kind of trophy.
Alien Fused Glass Night Light
Cool. An Alien Fused Glass Night Light. Is it just me or does that mustache make him look like the other kind of alien? The illegal kind? What? Just asking. My plan is to use this in my bedroom, so that when the real aliens come, they’ll see this and think they are the ones getting abducted. Or maybe they’ll just think that one of them is here already and move on. If I see this go down, I’ll throw my voice from the bed and say, “You essay. I got dis. Step off!”