This Carved Bone Skull Ring is hand carved. Put it on your own bone and rub it for luck. Sorry, that sounded dirty. I meant your knuckle bone. The folks who made this have some serious skull-skill. Bone Appetit people. Sorry, I pronounced that bone-a-pi-tit and that also sounded dirty. I know, I’m a bad boy. No need to skull-ed me!
Author: Artemis Winterford
Scottish Wood Imp Looking In The Mirror
What the deuce?! This Scottish Wood Imp Looking In The Mirror is horrified by what he is seeing. I don’t blame him. I am too. He’s all flapping his imp wings and scratching the frame with his nails. He always thought he was more handsome than that. Nope. That’s why ya never show an imp a mirror. Actually you know what? I don’t think he’s scared. Check out that impish grin. I think he is trying to have sex with that handsome imp in the mirror. That explains all of the scratching and excitement. I hope he doesn’t break the mirror with his erection. That’s seven years bad luck cuz your pee pee is sore for that long. Unless he’s l-imp? Ha ha ha ha ha. And his name is Dick. Ha ha ha ha.
I should get out more.
Terror Threads Horror Hoodies
TerrorThreadsOnEtsy wants to cover you in well, terror threads. You see, they hand weave each thread and infuse it with terror before turning them into awesome shirts, dresses and hoodies that have some great horror images. How do they terrorize their threads? They play Justin Bieber and Taylor Swift in the warehouse 24/7. That makes horror hoodies. Terror tees. And much more. It also makes the workers violently ill unless they wear earplugs, but they do it all for you. A few hoodies are featured below, but check out their store to check it all out.
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Zombie Cameo Barrette – The Accessorizing Dead
The Zombie Cameo Barrette is a stylish undead corpse for your hair. He doesn’t look happy about it either. I was wondering earlier if zombies went number 2. Aka took a crap. Then I realized that this is all they do. They crap their pants, they crap their skin off, sometimes their jaw takes a crap and falls right off. So zombies are the crappiest. They are basically nature’s ex-lax. This barrette is going to look great in your hair girls. No, I don’t mean that someone ex-laxed all over your hair. I’m just not good with words. That’s why I said crap like ten times here. I’m crap with words.
Arsenic and Cyanide Salt and Pepper Shakers
Arsenic and Cyanide. Sounds like a fun cop buddy flick to me. And the bad guys are about to get a lethal dose of justice! One is a seasoned veteran two weeks from retirement, the other a salty rookie! These Arsenic and Cyanide Salt and Pepper Shakers will give your dinner guests a scare when they go to season their food and pick their poison. Don’t tell my wife. She has been threatening to poison my food forever and this just might remind her. Yeah, I think I’m done with salt and pepper for awhile. Just to be safe. What? Not done with THAT Salt and Pepper.
Oooh, baby, baby. Baby, baby. Get up on this!