You ladies are going to look amazing wearing this Spider Skeleton Key Necklace. I wonder what it unlocks. Probably some treasure being protected by a giant spider queen. Nah. You know what it unlocks? My heart. Nah, not really. It unlocks a world of fashion and style cuz this necklace goes with anything girl. You gonna look sharp wearing the key to the spider kingdom. Sorry, I just gave away what it unlocks.
Category: Creep Wear
Cthulhu Amulet Of The Elder Gods Necklace
It’s official. I’m an Elder God. Check out my sweet Cthulhu Amulet Of The Elder Gods Necklace. Rub-a-dub-dub I’m in the club. Cthulhu in da house. Which is a bad idea people. I once let Cthulhu in the house and he ate all of my food and hogged the TV. I say hogged, it’s more like he shoved the TV in his mouth and ate it while I was watching Netflix. That ain’t how you binge watch dog! Then he puked. Okay, I guess that’s binge and purge watching. That’s cool, you can leave now!
Zombie Combat Academy Graduation Rings
Damn, look what I just got! My Zombie Combat Academy Graduation Rings from VonErickson. Now I officially know how to kick zombie ass. I got my diploma and everything. The teachers all said I excelled at the whole kicking a zombie in the balls thing, but I needed work on shooting them in the head with a sniper rifle. Still, I passed. I told you I would too amount to something mom!
I mean,when the zombies come, I’m still gonna run and hide in the basement and hoard all of the food,while helping no one. But it’s nice to know I can deal with zombies if I need to.
Checkout the video below.
Read more “Zombie Combat Academy Graduation Rings”
Alien Skull Ring – With This Ring I Thee Probe
Anybody else ever wake up the next morning after an abduction and find this Alien Skull Ring on your finger? And you’re not sure who your husband is, but judging by the burning in uranus, you know you had a hell of a honeymoon. Yeah, me either, I was just askin’.
I, the perverse alien dirtbag with a thing for hindquarter exploration, take you, puny human, to be my lawfully wedded wife, to have and to probe, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.
He asked me! He asked me! #blessed #sorebumforweeks #cantbeabindingcontract
Skull and Crossbones Wire Bun Cover
Damn. That Skull and Crossbones Wire Bun Cover is awesome. You know what they say, a bun on the head is better than a bun in the oven. That’s what I heard anyway. This is gonna make some librarian look totally badass. It’s Mary Poppins meets Mad Max. Where did they meet? I have no idea, but I hear they sat down for tea and talked shop for a few hours. Then they made sweet love and the credits gently rolled.