Tag: elvira

Elvira and Freddy Krueger Funko Cereal

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Elvira and Freddy Krueger Funko Cereal
What do we have here? It looks like Funko has revealed a new line of Funko Pop cereal, complete with in-box prizes. Each box of themed cereal will include a mini-Pop figure inside. I hope they have some activities on the box like mazes and stuff cuz it keeps me out of trouble. Some of our favorite people, like Elvira and Freddy Krueger, already have cereals planned. Check this out. When you add milk to the cereal it will give you a thematically creepy surprise. The Elvira cereal will turn spooky black, and the Freddy Krueger cereal will turn blood red! Nice!

The cereal will be sold through collectible stores and will go on sale in June of 2018.

via ihorror

Elvira Mistress of the Dark Spectral Switchboard Game

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Elvira Mistress of the Dark Spectral Switchboard Game
It’s easy for Elvira to communicate with the dead. And it’s not just cuz ghosts are drawn to her big boobies.I mean, they are, but she’s just in touch with the spirit world. But having big honking and half exposed boobies helps alot. Anyway, this Elvira Mistress of the Dark Spectral Switchboard Game is fun. You can talk to the departed while gawking at Elvira as she poses seductively, wondering what her secret is to not having those boobies fall out of that skimpy top. That’s half the fun of this game. In fact, that all I’m gonna ask this game. “Why don’t her boobies fall out?” And I’m gonna keep asking until I get an answer. The truth is out there.

Elvira’s Movie Macabre: The Coffin Collection

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Elvira's Movie Macabre The Coffin Collection
Check out Elvira’s Movie Macabre: The Coffin Collection if you want to watch 26 horrifying films on 13 DVD’s! Some are just horrifyingly terrible. Others are pretty awesome.You get over 38 1/2 hours of movies. All hosted by Elvira and her boobs. That’s why they call them B-Movies right? Cuz of boobs? I think that’s right. It all comes in a collectible tin coffin.

Elvira Christmas Deluxe Maquette Statue

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Elvira Christmas Deluxe Maquette Statue
Check out this Elvira Christmas Deluxe Maquette Statue. If that’s what Santa looks like, I’m signing up as an elf and making toys all year long. And staring at boobs. Gonna do lots of staring at boobs. And accidentally brushing up against them when I show her my toys. Va va voom! Know what I’m saying? I’m so on the naughty list. You better spank me Mistress Santa. It’s what I deserve.

Ladies of Horror Art Print Set

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Ladies of Horror Art Print Set
Time for some ladies of horror. And I’m not just talking about a meeting with my ex wives. That’s scheduled for lunch. I’m talking about this cool Ladies of Horror Art Print Set. Hmmmm. You know, they kinda all look like my ex wives. Except that these art prints are not yelling at me and screaming. This pleases me. I may just hang these on the wall and pretend I’m still married to them all like a nutty horror-mormon. They are so much easier to live with now. I think we’ll all be very happy.
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