Damn son! I always knew the Kraken was some chick’s hair. Yo, I ain’t your shampoo. Leave my ship alone! Why you bathing out here in the middle of the ocean anyway ya giant freak? Your hair smells lovely by the way. There goes half my men overboard. Hopefully, they end up in your hair like cooties. This Kraken Cameo Brooch is wild. Time for a haircut lady.
Tag: fun
Coffin Skeleton Candle
This Coffin Skeleton Candle is pretty awesome. Creepily cool. Frightfully foul. Terrifyingly terrific. The skeleton inside is all like, “Rest in peace my bony ass! How am I supposed to rest in peace when the damn coffin burns away exposing my naked skeleton body?” Cuz that’s what happens. As the candle burns the coffin melts away to expose the corpse inside. Kind of a metaphor for life. Now I’m depressed.
Bigfoot Catches Loch Ness Monster Artisan Coffee
Bigfoot Catches Loch Ness Monster Artisan Coffee tastes like what the scene smells like. Bigfoot BO and fishiness as two beasts battle. You get 8oz of whole bean coffee roasted to order, from family-owned farms, who are no doubt under siege daily from Bigfoot. He likes to steal coffee beans at night. It’s just what they do. Actually, these two beasts aren’t fighting. Bigfoot’s just doing some fishing.
Elvira and Freddy Krueger Funko Cereal
What do we have here? It looks like Funko has revealed a new line of Funko Pop cereal, complete with in-box prizes. Each box of themed cereal will include a mini-Pop figure inside. I hope they have some activities on the box like mazes and stuff cuz it keeps me out of trouble. Some of our favorite people, like Elvira and Freddy Krueger, already have cereals planned. Check this out. When you add milk to the cereal it will give you a thematically creepy surprise. The Elvira cereal will turn spooky black, and the Freddy Krueger cereal will turn blood red! Nice!
The cereal will be sold through collectible stores and will go on sale in June of 2018.
via ihorror
Colorful and Cute Squid Earrings
I hope these Colorful Squid Earrings don’t squirm into your ears and shoot their ink into your brain. I hope they’re squishy and slimy though. Not that I’ll wear them. They don’t match my complexion. My complexion is a nice shade of acne. Just in case you were wondering. Nah. I’m just playing like I’m some young awkward nerd, but really I’m a handsome and debonaire man. Of course, that could be the squid ink on my brain if I did wear these. How would I remember? Squids are weird.