SWEET! This John Carpenter’s The Fog action figure is gonna be the coolest in my collection. It’s highly articulated, fully lifelike and extremely detailed. That’s movie accurate right there son! The Fog is rolling in baby! You think your action figure is cool. Well fog you! This one is better. Just don’t open it or it will be lost forever!
Tag: odd
Fruit & Vegetables Carved Into Scary Skulls
Russian artist Dimitri Taykalov has a creepy obsession with skulls. Isn’t that called scoliosis. Nah, that’s something else. Pretty sure that’s something entirely different. He likes to carve fruits and vegetables into skulls. Nothing weird about that right? We all play with out food. Hell, I’ve been known to sit at the table for hours sculpting my mashed potatoes into a cool mountain, but that’s only because of UFOs.
No, Dimitri just loves turning stuff into skulls. Probably because he doesn’t want to eat his fruits and vegetables. I can dig that. Picky eaters usually turn into food artists for that very reason. Kinda like how I have no real skills in life, so I bring you cool and creepy stuff. Keeps me out of the loony bin, puts you one step closer. Isn’t it amazing how our lives all touch each other? Beets me. Lettuce meditate on that for awhile. Let it sink into your melon. Glad I could Pro-duce some humor in your day.
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This Steak Is Made Entirely Out Of Tape
This Steak Is Made Entirely Out Of Tape. That really ticks me off cuz it made me hungry. If I want a steak made of tape I’ll just let my wife cook tonight. It will taste like chewing on tape, plus it will probably give me a tape worm that I have to feed for like a year while it lays eggs in my gut.
This steak looks pretty realistic and unlike my wife’s it actually looks edible. I’m gonna show her this and tell her that’s what a steak should look like. It shouldn’t look like an off color turkey with atomic acne, all laced up with a shoelace. Damn I’m hungry!
Skull Lip Balm
Chapped lips? Grab this Skull Lip Balm. It’s the balm. I ain’t giving you no lip… service. I don’t know you that well. See what I did there? All other lip balms seem boring compared to this. Every time you rub it against your lips it will look like you are sampling a tint skulls brains, which I consider a bonus. So moisten those lips on a skull.
The bottom of this lip balm is embossed w/ the quotation: “Be all my sins remember’d” from Hamlet. See, it will help you remember all of your sins too.
Creepy And Cuddly Poppet Pillow Toys
Full disclosure. I have no idea what a poppet is, but I’m pretty sure it’s what the doctor removed from my rear. Rectum? No he destroyed ’em! Hahahaha. That’s a little butt humor right there. I apologize. I kept saying. Poppet! Just poppet!
Anyway… These Creepy And Cuddly Poppet Pillow Toys from doctormorose will look great in your home or mortuary. Say, isn’t that where Mort lives? That’s what mom used to say. That trip made me sad in my heart. Mort was not there. Only death. *Shudders*
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