Something wicked this way comes. Shhhhhhhh.It’s my ex-wife. I’m pretending I’m not home. But something cool is also coming. 8-Bit Horror Villains From Funko. This series features Freddy Krueger, Jason Voorhees and a Xenomorph. I can’t wait to see who else they add in the future. I would buy them myself, but the ex-wife just found me and she left with my money. Sad face.
Tag: scary
Spooky Sexy Gothic Black Cat Pendant
I made a poem about this Gothic Black Cat Pendant.
Black Kitty goes meow meow.
Black kitty wants food now now.
Black kitty ready to chow now!
Black kitty so hungry he could eat a cow now.
Black kitty is eating human cuz you should have fed black kitty.
I drew inspiration from my cat cuz that’s what he told me. Just before he bit my ankle.
Walking Octopuses Attack On The Shores Of Wales
*Holds up picket signs.* Octopus stay in the water! They walk, we run! Down with the cephalopods! *Drops picket signs and runs as the Octopi horde approaches.* Residents of beach community in Wales have witnessed dozens of octopi emerging from the ocean and walking along the shore. Witnesses yelled, “Stop doing that.” and “You aren’t people!”. One old man yelled, “It took you eight legs to do that? Ha! I got two and I been doing it my whole life!” He then proceeded to unload on the octopi “Terminator with a shotgun” style. Okay I made that last part up, but for reals, Octopuses are leaving the ocean and walking on shore like badasses.
At least twenty-five have been seen walking along the sands of New Quay beach over three consecutive nights. It looks like the beginning of an invasion people. Guard your beaches, protect your mermaids if you have ’em.
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Madballs Horrorballs
Remember Madballs? A bunch of you guys played with your balls as kids. That’s why they’re mad! Burned! Oh man, you walked right into that one. Anyway, these Madballs Horrorballs are the balls that you abused as kids, now returned as horror characters and mad as hell. You got Freddy, Jason, Leatherface, Alien, Predator and a Facehugger.
Octopus Tentacles Coffee Mugs Set
Get your tentacles off of my coffee. I didn’t touch your coffee. What do you take me for, a sucker? Like the ones on your tentacles? You kraken kleptomaniac! Okay, okay, I tried to steal your coffee. What about a trade instead? Hmmm. You mean a…. Fair trade? Forget it man, I don’t drink coffee with someone who makes bad jokes like that. Bean there, done that! Your joke was worse! Time to slap each other senseless with our tentacles and settle this for good! Then we can get back to our Octopus Tentacles Coffee Mugs.