Tablets weren’t meant to stand upright by themselves. That’s why you need an octopus to lend a hand. I mean tentacle. This Octopus Tentacle iPad Tablet Stand is just as good as having a real octopus on standby. In fact, it’s better cuz it won’t shoot ink in your face and tell you to f**k off in Octopus language. It also won’t get slime all over every surface in your house. It also won’t move the tablet around and mess with you while you’re binge watching Glee. I don’t watch that. Just an example. And if I did, I certainly wouldn’t cry. Just sayin’.
Tag: stand
Beetlejuice Ring Minder
Steps into a tiny room full of spikes going every which way. Closes the door and gets into the only safe corner. Clears throat.
“Beetlejuice. Beetlejuice. Beetlejuice.”
Dude materializes with a smile, instantly gets ready to pull his funny/crazy crap, but doesn’t because he instantly is impaled on spikes that he materialized into. And THAT is how you get rid of Beetlejuice. Now you know how to handle that crazy sumb-itch!
Let’s talk rings. Are you the lord of them? I’m J.R.R. Talkin’ to you. If you have more rings than you know what to do with, this Beetlejuice Ring Minder is a stylish way to display them. Once you’ve rid yourself of that Beetlejuice freak of course. Now you know how.
Bones The English Butler
Bones The English Butler apparently doesn’t know how to wear pants that fit. Or shoes. But he’s a good servant. He puts up with a lot.
“Bones, come here. I need you!”
“How may I be of help sir?”
“You can start by wearing a proper shirt that will cover your ribs. There’s a good man. And for good sake’s chap, must your free hand always be in the position of catching a high five from behind, while it is down low because I’m too slow? Straighten up and get me a brandy so I can stand the sight of you. And get that murder out of your eye sockets.”
“Death sir…”
“What was that?”
“Yes sir!”
“Quite. Quite.”