These Devilish Gothic Troll Statues are a pair of mischievous motherf***ers. Are they trolls or gargoyles? I have no idea, but they look like they ate something that didn’t agree with them. Like they were talking politics with a pair of frogs, and ended with, “Do you frogs agree or disagree?” Frogs disagreed, so they ate ’em. That’s how troll-gargoyle dudes eat dinner.
Tag: Design Toscano
Day of the Dead King and Queen Skeleton Statues
Today may not be the Day of the Dead, but that doesn’t mean I won’t buy these Day of the Dead King and Queen Skeleton Statues and put them in my yard. It also doesn’t mean I won’t kneel before the royal couple and pledge my loyalty to them. Hey, I need structure. I’m best when people or skeletons are giving me orders. That way I have someone to blame all of my bad decisions on. So what would you have me do my king and queen? Rob a liquor store? Well, if it’s for the good of the kingdom…
Sadly, that’s how I found out that skeletons don’t have access to bail money. They also don’t care that your cellmate also wants to be your boyfriend.
Shark Attack Bathroom Toilet Paper Holder – Great Wipe Shark
We’re gonna need a bigger bathroom. This Shark Attack Bathroom Toilet Paper Holder is perfect. Ya know why? Cuz it’s a Great Wipe Shark. It takes a great white to deal with a great brown. Know what I’m saying. This guy will always be there while you are creating your own sharknado. Look at that look on his face. I can’t tell if he’s laughing or mad about the smell.
Feel The Sting Of The Scorpion Skull Mirror
This Sting Of The Scorpion Skull Mirror looks pretty cool. I’ll just freshen myself up here and comb my hair, while I scare myself senseless cuz A. That mirror is creepy and I see myself within the skull and B. That scorpion now appears to be crawling on my mirror-face. In other words, I love it. By the way, did you hear the one about the scorpion who became a director? His name is David Pincher. Ha ha ha ha ha.
Bigfoot Kidnapping Gnomes Statue
When one mythical creature starts kidnapping other mythical creatures, you know things are bad, as evidenced by this Bigfoot Kidnapping Gnomes Statue. Technically it’s gnome-napping. Which is a misde-minor. Get it? Misdemeanor… Misde-minor cuz their so small. He’s probably gonna take them back to his cave or stick-hut and cook them for dinner. Maybe he just wants company too. Or slaves. Maybe he’s gonna make them build him a Bigfoot castle.