Looking for an aluminum Chainmail Octopus Mask? We have one for you. Now you can be elegant and mysterious and yet be terrifying at the same time. I’m gonna be just walking around town wearing this thing, looking like a medieval Cthulhu. A swagger in my step. That’s right, I’m badass. You can’t buy this, but you can buy a book that teaches you how to make it. Consider it bought biatches!
via Spoodoir
That’s a nice pair of The Wolfman Universal Monsters High-Waisted Panties ya got there. Just can’t tell if it’s really the wolfman or if you just need to shave. Either way, I’m good with that and ready for a sexy night. My weiner is so small you’ll think that I invited the Invisible Man, so it’s all good. Maybe we should invite the rest of the monsters and have a party. I love that they’re high waisted, cuz I’m also high wasted if ya know what I mean.
Be the ultimate creeper with these horrifying Scary Leather Masks. You’ll be Leatherface for real. Make sure to get yourself some tattered robes and some claws to go with your mask for the full effect. Just don’t be jumping out at me in the woods or things will get messy. Not for you, for me. I swear if you make me poop myself so I have to run home with poop between my buttcheeks… Once was enough.
These Skull Jewel and Crystal Encrusted Wedges are crazy! No really. Those skulls look like they are insane in the membrane. Fun fact: At first I accidentally made the title, “Skull Jewel and Crystal Encrusted Wedgies”. So, just to be clear, these are not wedgies. You are safe nerds. And damn, that would hurt. A regular wedgie is bad enough, but those jewel encrusted wedgies hurt like a biatch!
Check out my new Medusa Gorgon Ring. *Holds it up to your face* Bam! Turned to stone. Just like the ELO song. I’m turning people into stone wherever I go. You might say I’m getting lots of people hard. Get your mind out of the gutter. I’m just saying that I’m the ultimate drug cuz if I’m nearby, you’re stoned! I love this ring and I would never take it for granite!