Tag: etsy

Toys For Little Creepers – Plush Skeleton Dolls

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Toys For Little Creepers - Plush Skeleton Dolls
I can’t decide if these Plush Skeleton Dolls are cute or creepy, but that one guy in the back with no face… Nightmare fuel! Look at them. Just one big happy family with momma skeleton holding them all on a rocker. They’re tight too. Nobody makes fun of no-face or calls him names like Void or Spaceface, but you can tell that even they are creeped out by him. Did you know that plush skeletons grow up to become all rigid and bony, losing all of their plushy flesh by 12 years old? True story.

Do you think that pumpkin stole that kids face? Damn. Now I’m more weirded out by the pumpkin. Probably took his soul too. Yeah, that pumpkin is the real power behind the throne. There’s some messed up stuff going on here.

Embroidered Spider Notebook

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Embroidered Spider Notebook
Use this Embroidered Spider Notebook to write down whatever you want, but I’m gonna use it to write my one man rap play called “One-man Spider Killing Army”. Here’s the theme song:

I’m a one-man spider killing army
Cuz eight legged freaks be tryin’ to harm me.

Black Widow, Brown recluse, I don’t give a f**k.
I spray Raid and Black Flag all over my truck.

Feelin’ kinda woozy when I hit that stop light.
My head hits the dashboard and I say goodnight.

Bugs don’t stand a chance cuz I creep up on ’em like a villain.
Then I raise my boot and I stone cold kill ’em.

They creep up to my club like some VIP
Then they get a hit of some DDT!

It’s gonna be awesome. The rest is a secret. Totally gonna kickstart it.

Mr. Gross Face iPhone 7 Case

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Mr. Gross Face iPhone 7 Case
Call this nightmare monstrosity anything you want. I think we can all agree that it’s ugly. A face only a mother could love? This guy’s mother left him on the church doorstep. Then burned the church down. Dude is so ugly, he went to a haunted house and came out with an application. He is so ugly, when he sits in the sand, cats try to bury him. Damn this dude is ugly. Fugly even. But if you like ugly and disgusting, this iPhone 7 case is for you. I gotta look away, so later peeps.

Skeleton Light Switch Cover Plate

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Skeleton Light Switch Cover Plate
I like to see skeletons every time I flip the switch. So I guess it’s good that I’m the local electric chair executioner. I kid. I kid. I like to see them on my light switch cover. Even if this Skeleton Light Switch Cover Plate does make me scream every time I turn the lights on. It shows a skeleton from the front and from the back. And may I just say that you have a nice pelvis. Hey, does your gluteus maximus turn into a gluteus minimus when you are all bones? I’m gonna say yes.

Super Terrifying Cat Candle Holder

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Terrifying Cat Candle Holder
This cat candle holder is scary as hell, with the glowing eyes, crazy attitude and Mr. T gold chain. Oh and the bat wings. It’s nom nom time and fluffy isn’t f**king around! The only string this cat wants to play with is your intestines. Probably looks crazy as hell with a candle in him. It will probably scare any mice you have away for good.