Tag: etsy

Dragon Head Flats

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Dragon Head FlatsAside from being an awesome band name, Dragon Head Flats are these cool shoes with dragons on them. Also sounds like a place with dragon skulls everywhere. “Hey man, I’ll race ya at dragon head flats!” I am so there. Sadly, these shoes don’t breath fire so you ladies are just gonna have to settle for the old fashioned “kicking us in the balls” when we misbehave, which is a lot. Cuz I’ll probably piss you off with puns like:

Hey you are really draggin’ today. Are you the mother of dragons? Cool, cuz I wanna be the dad.

Stuff like that, cuz I’m what they call an arsehole in the UK and an A-hole everywhere else. Sweet dragons though. You need like dragon print leggings to go with these. See? I offered a good tip. I’m not a complete A-hole. More like a B-Hole cuz I was never an A student, unless I was saying, “Aaaa this sucks.” which it did.

Gothic Bats Wrapping Paper

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Gothic Bats Wrapping Paper
Sweet gift! Awesome Gothic Bats Wrapping Paper! What’s inside? Is it bats? Guano? Both? A baseball BAT? BAT-teries? A BATman toy? A plush womBAT? A BATTY Crocker cookbook? I’m so excited. I love a good gift. I’m gonna tear it open okay? Cool. Here goes. *Rippppp* Oh sweet. It’s BAT WRAPPING PAPER, which was wrapped in Bat wrapping paper. Now I’m gonna go wrap up everything I own so it looks cool. Then I’m gonna double upon my meds cuz sometimes that’s fun too. K bye.

Cat Skull Brooch

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Cat Skull Brooch
HISSSSSSSSSS MEOWWWWWWW I need this brooch now. This Cat Skull Brooch is all cat, all skull, all brooch. You can wear it on your sweater. You know, if you want to scare the skin off your cat so it looks just like this. Then you’ll have another one to wear. Good idea. A two for one deal. Here kitty kitty.

Nightmare On Elm Street Freddy Krueger Soap

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Nightmare On Elm Street Freddy Krueger Soap
What is that smell? Damn Freddy! Now I smell why they call you a nightmare on elm street. You rank son! Here, try this Nightmare On Elm Street Freddy Krueger Soap. You might want to wash that sweater and hat once in awhile too. You smell like you look. Like a trucker’s rest stop bathroom in hell. Just go over there. Further. Further. Is this a dream? Cuz you smell real. Real nasty! Get outta here Freddy and don’t come back until your ass is clean.