The Stones Have Eyes!

The Stones Have Eyes!
The Stones have eyes! Have you seen that movie? Me either, but now I know it’s true. Well, all of the Stones have eyes, it’s true, except Keith Richards, who is all robot now. Is it just me or do these rocks look slightly… stoned? Anyway, they look weird and cool and they have eyes. They are ready to rock! Granite, they can’t really see you, but they will look cool on your shelf. I thought I saw a cobweb on one. Does that mean they have web-site? So many rock jokes, so little time. Anywho, get yourself some cool rocks with eyes.

One final joke. How are these stones like a Camaro? Eye-roc. Get it? I’m so sorry…

Skull Sack – That’s Really A Big Bag Of Skulls

Big Bag Of SkullsDamn. That is a big bag of skulls. You get 12 skulls that you can decorate with, talk to, whatever. It’s a bag and it is full of skulls. It’s a skull-filled bag is what I’m saying. And you know what THEY say, 12 skulls are better than one. I myself plan to use them as mini bowling balls in a public bowling alley just to see people’s reactions. What would you do with a big ass bag of skulls?

Feel The Sting Of The Scorpion Skull Mirror

Sting Of The Scorpion Skull Mirror
This Sting Of The Scorpion Skull Mirror looks pretty cool. I’ll just freshen myself up here and comb my hair, while I scare myself senseless cuz A. That mirror is creepy and I see myself within the skull and B. That scorpion now appears to be crawling on my mirror-face. In other words, I love it. By the way, did you hear the one about the scorpion who became a director? His name is David Pincher. Ha ha ha ha ha.

The Raven Nevermore Gothic Candle

The Raven Nevermore Gothic Candle
Be in darkness nevermore thanks to this cool and creepy The Raven Nevermore Gothic Candle. “Quoth the raven, `Nevermore.'” “Quoth me, Just give me that cool candle and shut your seed-hole! You are so negative bird! How about FOREVERmore instead of NEVERmore. God, I can’t be around you.” That’s why ravens and I don’t get along. I’m very rude. This is also why birds attack me in public. Oh man, I almost accidentally typed “pubic”. Thank God they don’t attack me there.

This candle is inspired by Poe’s poem The Raven. It will look great with your other Gothic decor.

Sexy and Educational Anatomy Tights

Sexy and Educational Anatomy Tights
Damn girl! Your anatomy is looking tight in those anatomy tights! Sorry if I’m staring. I’m just trying to learn about the body. Mind if I rub my hand all over these images? I’m a very textile learner. What? Oh I meant tactile. Wait, did you smack me cuz I don’t know english or because I was being a perv? Doesn’t really matter at this point. What have I learned from this situation? Well, if I deciphered your tights correctly, I learned that you have a nice hippocampus and I’d really like to enroll there. No? I stand by my interpretation.

Your legs have given me much food for thought and now I’m off to other adventures.