Tiny Mermaid Skeleton Model Kit

mermaid bones
Mermaids are the sexiest thing in the sea. In or out of holographic bodysuits. And This trio must be the super model variety. They are all skin and bones. Which is probably why they don’t do a thing for my rusty barnacle. I would have totally thrown them my dingy when they were still buxom and wet though.

Etsy seller Tinysaurs makes all kinds of cool skeletal model kits. You can get cool dinosaurs like this T-Rex, this Plesiosaur and many more. Build them and display them and wonder at mother nature. Then be scared s**tless that we are all just a sack of bones.
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This Mermaid Statue Is Not The Siren You Were Looking For

Mermaid StatueI thought mermaids were supposed to be beautiful, but this mermaid isn’t gonna use it’s assets to lure any sailors to their doom. This rooster-headed, perhaps half vampire monstrosity could have used a support net on those tatas too, because they have seen better days. They are sagging toward Davy Jones’ locker.

For only $79 you can scare the bejesus out of everyone and sicken your mailman everyday, by putting this in your front yard.
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Mermaid Holographic Bodysuit

Mermaid Holographic BodysuitDo androids dream of electric sheep? Do holographic mermaids dream of electric eels? I have no idea, but I like how you’re rockin’ that $155 holographic mermaid bodysuit my fishy feminine friend. Of course, that may be due to the fact that YOU ARE HYPNOTIZING THE S**T OUT OF ME with those glasses.

Damn girlfriend, I would have come willingly and given you some sweet love. No need for mermaid trickery. I know all the right things to do and say my sweet ocean siren. Want a sample? Here goes: “Hey baby, them scales is heavy.” Which of course means something entirely different to a human woman. You can say that to a mermaid, NOT to a woman who just stepped off a scale. Lesson learned.
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