This Chick Magnet might be just the thing to get the ladies. That’s what a chick magnet is right? It’s crazy enough that it just might work. Woman sees chick, is impressed and that chick hangs around, thinks I have good taste in fridge magnets. Then we live happily ever after, calling each other chicken head. That’s a love story right there.
These taxidermy magnets are ethically sourced and totally whacked. All I know is that I need more chicken heads in my life. Cuz I’m weird like that.
Nothing says Christmas like a dead squirrel head wearing a Santa hat. This Taxidermy Squirrel Santa Claus Christmas Ornament will make sure that you have a very merry rodent filled Christmas. He doesn’t even have a neck. Dude is just all head and all hat. Like a floating ghost in search of nuts that he will never find. Well, unless you hang him on your tree at crotch level and lean in too close. Then it’s all screaming and blood dripping on the presents below.
He’s part spider, part bat, all albino. This Albino Bat Spider Faux Taxidermy is great for tricking your friends and telling them that you hunted this beast. Hunted it to extinction, which is why you don’t see them out in the wild. I like that it’s mouth looks so surprised. Whattttt? I’m on somebody’s wall? You sure are. Nice beard by the way. You got that whole snow white Santa thing going on. I bet the chicks love that. Looks distinguished.
Do I call it a spat? A Bider? An Albato? A Spalbino? A Spatbino? I’ll just call it nightmare fuel!
Serial Killer art is so…what’s the word I’m looking for? “It puts the lotion on!” These Framed Human Prosthetic Eyes will follow you around the room. Maybe even undress you with their eyes. Then gawk some more. Ewwwww! There are four pairs of eyes, all sizing you up. I don’t know what’s more disturbing the fact that this is a set of four eyes in a frame, or the fact that they all share the same skin. They should really all be looking at each other and forming an escape plan. Not that eyes can escape. If they could, my eyes would have bugged out when I first saw this thing.
You remember that shrunken head guy from Beetlejuice? Me either. I had my own shrunken head while watching that flick, thanks to the Vodka. Ever drink so much that it pickles your brain and your head feels all shriveled up? Yeah, I felt like this guy looks. Right down to the huge eyeballs, but that’s just cuz I saw a rat. Then I froze like that until somebody else came along and got rid of it. We all cope in our own ways.
Has anyone ever actually tried Beetle Juice? Judging by this guy’s face, I bet it’s sour. Bet he never tried that again! You ever talk with your mouth full while you’re blogging? I do. I said “Beetlejuice”only it sounded like “Fetal Juice”. I was horrified. Then I laughed and almost choked. I’m so lonely. *sigh* At least I can share these special moments with you guys.