Tag: faux taxidermy

Scary Chupacabra Corpse Sculpture

DavidLeave a comment

Scary Chupacabra Corpse Sculpture
People love monster stories. Any decent story told involves a monster. Just ask my ex-wife. There are reports of chupacabra sightings in the Americas and eerie stories of body part trails left behind by these blood-sucking creatures. But we have never discovered a Chupacabra corpse. Until now…

Imagine having a Chupacabra corpse lying around the house. The corpse is so well sculpted out of paper pulp clay, paper mache, and polymer clay, no one will fail to believe that you actually met and killed a Chupacabra. With professional mask hair, acrylic hair and good craftsmanship, it is so realistic it will scare you at night.

Albino Bat Spider Faux Taxidermy – Nightmare Fuel

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Albino Bat Spider Faux Taxidermy
He’s part spider, part bat, all albino. This Albino Bat Spider Faux Taxidermy is great for tricking your friends and telling them that you hunted this beast. Hunted it to extinction, which is why you don’t see them out in the wild. I like that it’s mouth looks so surprised. Whattttt? I’m on somebody’s wall? You sure are. Nice beard by the way. You got that whole snow white Santa thing going on. I bet the chicks love that. Looks distinguished.

Do I call it a spat? A Bider? An Albato? A Spalbino? A Spatbino? I’ll just call it nightmare fuel!

Pink Mounted Werewolf Head

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Pink Mounted Werewolf Head
What can I tell ya. It was the 90s. There was a rave. A Werewolf attacked. So I took the pacifier out of my mouth, shoved my lightstick down it’s throat along with some X and this guy got less bloodthirsty. He’s all like, I wuv you man. I weally weally wuv you. I ever tell you that?” We partied all night then I took his head and decorated my house with this Pink Mounted Werewolf Head.

He’ll never raid a rave on a full moon again!
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Dog Faux Taxidermy Heads

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Dog Faux Taxidermy Heads
Boy are my dogs tired. Guess I better retire them and put their barking heads on the wall. These Dog Faux Taxidermy Heads from LisaPay look pretty realistic. What? A Boston Terrier? You’re barking up the wrong tree! I’m more of a Great Dane man. More like I love a great danish. You put these trophy heads on the wall and people will think that you are a dog serial killer. I don’t mean a dog that goes around killing people and calls himself the Zodiac Shiatsu. I mean it will look like you are the sicko. Anyway, nobody will ever catch the Zodiac Shiatsu or the Ted Bundy Beagle. They are too crafty.
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Weird Art Prints- Faux Taxidermy Cameos

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Weird Art Prints- Faux Taxidermy Cameos
These Weird Art Prints- Faux Taxidermy Cameos from LuxCups are fun and freaky. I would totally wear them, but I can’t, because they’re prints. You have your shark in a suit (Must be a lawyer), a nun with a dinosaur head, Godzilla as a priest and more. I wish I could get these guys as action figures.

I’m weird like that, but that’s why you and I get along. I bring you the weird and freaky stuff, you bring me warm fuzzy feelings. Nevermind. Didn’t realize I was rubbing the fuzzy dice hanging from my computer. OUCH! Never mind. It was a pair of bees! Damn my bad eyesight and your furry hides!

Anyway, the point is we’re all good, you and me, but if it’s a parasite host relationship kind of deal, I’m pretty sure I’m the parasite. Just sayin’. No need to flush me out of your bowels or anything though. I’m the good kind. Of course, that’s just what a parasite would say, isn’t it? I guess you’re just gonna have to trust me. We got a mutually beneficial thing going on here.
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