If you are the king of the dancehall like I am, you have no problem showing everybody how it’s done. Just promise to go easy on your stiff friends. Or you can get them this fur jacket so that they can be the center of attention at least this once on the dance floor. Nah. I’ll wear this myself. This Fur Jacket With Light-Up Monster Eyes That Glow is filled with big monster eyes of different colors. The fur acts like eyelashes, which is a bonus. Finally, people can stop focusing on how awful you are at dancing and focus on your many eyes.
Tag: novelty
Big Foot Breeding Area Sign
Place this Big Foot Breeding Area Sign in the woods where Bigfoots f**k and help unsuspecting humans stay on the marked trails. I would too. Bigfoot breeding is nothing to mess with. And nothing you want to see. It’s worse than walking in on your parents while they’re doing it. Is Big Foot real? You tell me after you see them in action bumping hairy uglies. Do they go on dates first? What is beautiful to a Bigfoot? A bigger foot? A stronger jaw? I have no idea, but I can’t unsee them doing the nasty.
Livin La Vida Larvae – Fly Ring
Normal rings are for boring, ordinary folk. That’s why you should wear this fly ring on your finger. It looks like there’s a fly dry humping your finger with its legs wrapped around it. Dry humping? Fly humping? It is literally a fly ring. Fly as in stylin’. Fly as in nasty creature evolved from a maggot.
This ring actually looks awesome and would actually make you look… fly. The ring size is adjustable so that it fits different finger sizes. Convenient if you are looking for a present for your friend who wouldn’t mind wearing a bug.
Kawaii Skeleton Bodysuit Onesie
This Kawaii Skeleton Bodysuit Onesie is the perfect gift for that female lover of anatomy on your list. It’s not meant to be scary and creepy, but it is to me because it feels like you are trippin’ looking at it. You can wear it around the house and haunt your own digs or take it outside and freak out others. The front zip is hidden and the material is made of top quality stretch fabric which means it is durable. Look at that paint job. You got some nice bones girl!
Cryptid Tarot Cards
These Cryptid Tarot Cards will reveal your fortune. OMG! Ask me about my love life!
Ok. I see a tall dark stranger.
OMG! Is he rich?
No. He’s very hairy and he has big feet.
Does he have money?
No, but he has a hut made of sticks and everything outside is his toilet. You’ll be happy.