Tag: fly

Fly Coasters – Coffee Rings Can Buzz Off

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

fly coasters
Creepy, crawly, flies swarm all around these fly coasters! Does the thought of bugs creeping and flying around your face make you want to scream? *Rauses my own hand* These gothic fly coasters will definitely send you running! Just keep swatting….these flies won’t die! Hear their buzz, feel their creepy, little feet. Eternal, stone flies buzz around you for eternity from within the soul of this item. You know what I hate. How flies land all over your food when you are just trying to have a nice little picnic. Hey, thanks for laying eggs all over my hot dog, which I will then ingest as I harbor your mutant offspring in my stomach. This is why flies are evil.

They’re a curiosity for Halloween or anytime! Feel the buzz. The flies are coming! Forever filthy, buzzing flies, locked in stone for eternity. Or, are they???? Keep your flyswatter handy! If you happen to love these evil insects, check out these Fly earrings.

Livin La Vida Larvae – Fly Ring

DavidLeave a comment

Livin La Vida Larvae - Fly Ring
Normal rings are for boring, ordinary folk. That’s why you should wear this fly ring on your finger. It looks like there’s a fly dry humping your finger with its legs wrapped around it. Dry humping? Fly humping? It is literally a fly ring. Fly as in stylin’. Fly as in nasty creature evolved from a maggot.

This ring actually looks awesome and would actually make you look… fly. The ring size is adjustable so that it fits different finger sizes. Convenient if you are looking for a present for your friend who wouldn’t mind wearing a bug.

This Really Bugs Me – Nasty Fly Earrings

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Fly Earrings
Flies are all the rage this year. Everyone on the runway is wearing them. So these Fly Earrings are the perfect accessory. Fly. The maggot evolved. Nature’s gross butterfly. Flies are filthy and disgusting and totally belong on your ears. I can’t wait for some fly to land on your ear and try to mate with your earrings. That’s nasty.

Clay Fly Face Wall Hanger For Your House – It’s A Housefly

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Clay Fly Face Wall Hanger
When you absolutely need the head of a giant fly on your wall, there is the Clay Fly Face Wall Hanger. It would be in your house so technically it’s a housefly. I guess. Put it on your horse and it’s a horsefly. Is it May? Then it’s a Mayfly. If it falls off your wall it means your fly is down. Whatevs. Time for me to fly.

Memento Mori Mourning Ring

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Memento Mori Mourning Ring
Do you know what Memento mori means? I had to look it up, cuz you know, 3rd grade education here. It means “remember that you must die”. I was like, okay thanks for the advice. And to you? Remember that you must get a fist to your face! Remind me about my mortality will you? Anyway, this Memento Mori Mourning Ring can be worn in morning and in mourning. Anytime you like actually. Anytime you feel like you need a big old fly on your knuckle with a skull on it’s butt. It looks like the Hell’s Angels of flies.

He’s all like, “A picnic? Let me land on your hot dog. have a look at my big old badonkadonk skull! Enjoy the plague!”