Give a hoot, wear a Screech Owl Skull Necklace. I knew you would like it, cuz we’re birds of a feather. Can I get a “who who”? Can I get a “hoot hoot”? I say who, you say who. Together we say who who! This bird skull necklace is owl ta this world!
Seriously, these bird skulls are gonna look good with that outfit you have on.
Read more “Screech Owl Skull Necklace”
Check out this Ugly Face Toilet Plunger Cover. Dude, your face is so ugly I want to stick a toilet plunger in it. I bet this guy has heard that a million times. He’s got a face so ugly only a toilet plunger could love it. I guess that means he has a potty mouth. Honestly, this guy doesn’t look too bright, so he probably doesn’t mind getting rammed by a toilet plunger. I don’t even know the guy and I want to shove one in his head.
Read more “Ugly Face Toilet Plunger Cover”
This set of Freddy Krueger Nightmare On Elm Street Windchimes makes me suspect I’m actually in a dream. If I get too close and try to shut them up, it’s gonna go crazy and slash at me. That’s why I’m trying to wake myself by repeatedly pinching myself and throwing drinks in my own face. So far all it’s gotten me is a rash and a giant puddle on the carpet. Whatevs. Let it make all of the noise it wants. If I go to sleep while already sleeping he can’t get me. And if he can, I’m gonna keep sleeping in each dream and he will have to catch me. Eventually I’ll wake up….
Unless I have to wake up again and again until I find my way back to the first dream. This shizz is confusing. God dammit Freddy! Can’t I get one night’s sleep?
The best part of waking up…is embalming fluid in your cup… I wouldn’t try that actually, but this Embalming Fluid Coffee Mug is pretty awesome. When you’re feeling post mortem, grab a cup of coffee and resurrect yourself. Be pre mortem. Sweet!
Holy shizz this guy is ugly. This Monster UV reactive mask is gonna be the perfect way to terrorize my neighbors. UV stands for ultra venereal, which as we all know, makes you glow like a radioactive freak and spreads from your weiner to your face. Huh? Ultra Violet? What the hell is that? Is that like Blu-Ray? Cuz I’m still rockin’ the VHS tapes.