Tag: strange

Scary Laser Cut Necklaces

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Scary Laser Cut Necklaces
These Scary Laser Cut Necklaces from CuriologyLtd are so spooky and scary. They will turn your neck into a haunted scene that will turn heads a full 360 degrees like in The Exorcist. But don’t worry, they won’t spit green pea soup at you as they are admiring your necklace. These scenic necklaces are all laser cut. Not phaser cut. Laser cut. Phasers don’t cut well enough, cuz it’s just a phase, but lasers? Lasers will cut you and blind you and kill space aliens. They probably cut these with a friggin’ ray-gun. Pew pew pew! Look what I created!

They have black magic cats, spiders, all kinds of creepy neck wear.
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Chainsaw Oven Mitt And Necronomicon Casserole

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Chainsaw Oven Mitt And Necronomicon Casserole
Etsy seller StellarEvolutionD is pretty handy in the kitchen. She not only whipped up this cool chainsaw oven mitt, but also baked that sweet-ass necronomicon casserole you see there. It’s so neat it’s sassy. That makes it a sass-erole!

What time is dinner? I’ll be over at 6. I’d like the whole face part for myself though. We can take turns wearing that oven mitt and pretending we are chopping each other’s limbs off. That’s a fun night. We’ll end it with a food fight. Sorry, gotta go. You can clean up. Thanks for the grub. See you at the next necronomi-con.
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Zombie Chia Pet

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Zombie Chia Pet
Cha cha cha Chia! This Zombie Chia Pet is a great way to decorate your home with a zombie that won’t eat your brains. I don’t think. It just looks like a zombie crawling out of the grass. I’m no good with pets so I’m just gonna pass on this one. I would probably forget to feed it and that’s when the zombie would come after me trying to get a brain snack. He’s in for a big surprise. There’s not much there. The joke is on you Chia Zombie. Why do you think I forgot to feed ya.

No Thanks: Spider Backpack

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Spider Backpack
I don’t want to alarm you, but there’s a spider on your back. He looks like a spider backpack, but he’s all jacked into your spine and brain, controlling your every action. What do you do? Well, I would hand a good friend a taser and let him zap that stowaway. Hopefully he doesn’t miss and the spider has a seizure before falling to the ground dead. That’s how you deal with that little problem.

Same way I got rid of that tick I had on my side last year, when I grabbed some exposed wire from the wall and slammed it into my side after yelling CLEAR! Blew him to smithereens and burned every hair off my body. I may have looked like a naked mole rat, but I was a naked mole rat without a tick attached. Lifehacks for the win!

Brian The Giant Turd Stuffed Doll

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Brian The Giant Turd Stuffed Doll
I was just saying the other day that every Brian I meet turns out to be a real turd. I’m sure their not all bad, but man, I’ve met a lot of turds named Brian. Here’s another. Brian The Giant Turd Stuffed Doll. He’s ready to be displayed in your home so he can turd up your place. Hopefully they deliver him on time and he’s not turdy. I mean tardy. I’m not sure what his maker ate, but it looks like he’s got some green shading there. Also very puffy eyes. I guess it’s tiring being a turd. Or maybe he’s just sad he came in turd place in a contest.

Also, how do you get a turd that’s segmented in that way? I’m guessing you push, squeeze and push squeeze. I have no idea. And who would have thought that a turd could have such full lips? It’s from kissin’ butt on the way out. He’s a little brown noser. That’s probably why somebody gave him that shiner on his eye.
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