Damn, that bat is hardcore cute! Put this Cute Velvet Bat in your belfry, car window, pocket, whatever. Who doesn’t love bats? The insects that they eat. That’s who. Otherwise everybody loves a bat. What? You don’t love bats? What’s wrong with you? What, are you batty? This guy looks like a little bat Dracula. Bat-cula.
Author: Artemis Winterford
Graham Is A Nightmare Human Designed To Survive Car Accidents
What in the many-nippled f**k? This is Graham. This freak of nature is a human designed by Australia’s Transport Accident Commission to survive car accidents. Basically, if you don’t look like this nightmare, you should be more careful when you drive. If you do look like this guy… All hope is lost. Seriously, you ugly son!
You could feed whole litters of cats with those nipples. The idea behind all of those fun bags? That they act like air bags to protect this guy’s ribs.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RpAmdEmH9I4
via Geekologie
Coffin Heart Brooch
This Coffin Heart Brooch is a coffin. It’s a heart. If anyone has ever ripped out your heart and buried it six feet under, you know the pain I’m talking about. Also, if someone did that to you, you are probably dead. Cuz we can’t survive without a heart. Politicians are the exception.
Wear this brooch proudly near your heart. It may just protect you from heartbreak. *sobs* I just can’t… I feel so lonely and sad and used. Why? Why was the store out of Cool Ranch Doritos? Dear God, why? *sobs hysterically.*
Ouija Board Tea-Towel
Are you enjoying your tea? Excellent. Now it is time to consult the oracle that I like to call the Ouija Board Tea-Towel. Place it flat on the table please. Now we shall use a cups as a planchette.
Oh Ouija towel, doorway to spirits, what say you to this realm? *cup begins to move just as the guest spills tea all over the table.* Damn it! *Cleans it up with the Ouija towel.* Now we’ll never know what it was gonna say.
Disney Horror Characters Painting
This is a Disney Horror Characters Painting. It turns Disney Characters into horror icons. It’s not about the horror of the Disney parks? $10 for a grilled cheese sandwich at f**king Epcot? I can make that for like 10 cents. That’s the real horror of Disney. Any mouse tries to charge me $10 for a grilled cheese sandwich, I’m punching him in his nose. Which is probably why I was asked to leave by the two hulking Mickey-police!