Feeling Batty? Me too. Check out this cool Copper Bat Pendant Necklace. It’s friggin’ awesome. Bat-tastic. Bat-mazing. I just want to stare at it all day, but then I would be accused of staring at your breasts. And you’d tell me, “Hey, my bats are up here.” So then I’d look up at the bats in your hair and realize you were Horror host Elvira. Then I’d look down at your breasts for real and get slapped. But I would regret nothing.
Tag: bat
Albino Bat Spider Faux Taxidermy – Nightmare Fuel
He’s part spider, part bat, all albino. This Albino Bat Spider Faux Taxidermy is great for tricking your friends and telling them that you hunted this beast. Hunted it to extinction, which is why you don’t see them out in the wild. I like that it’s mouth looks so surprised. Whattttt? I’m on somebody’s wall? You sure are. Nice beard by the way. You got that whole snow white Santa thing going on. I bet the chicks love that. Looks distinguished.
Do I call it a spat? A Bider? An Albato? A Spalbino? A Spatbino? I’ll just call it nightmare fuel!
Scary Vampire Skull Mask
Damn. This Vampire Skull Mask is what vampires look like under their pale skin and beady little eyes? Dude must have been in bat form when he died. Sucks. Was probably drunk and flew right into a tree. Happens. Fun fact: My vampire name is Bela Lu-Gassy. For obvious reasons. Of course in high school they called me Vlad The Inhaler for completely different reasons. This is the perfect mask to wear to one of the Eyes Wide Shut Illuminati parties. Not that I ever get invited.
Vampire Bat Sculptural Box
This Vampire Bat Sculptural Box will make ya squee like a little bat. But if it makes you flap your wings and fly around the room, you’ve gone too far. This bat will hold all of your little trinkets and baubles and do-dads. Not sure if it will hold your whatchamacallits. It’s bat-tastic. It’s batting a thousand. It’s bat-s**t crazy. Swing batter batter. Time to batton down the hatches. Quick, to the bat cave robin! Wait, was that the phone? Nah, you just heard my batarang! And with that, I’m off to adjust my meds.
Awesome Cat Candle Holder
This Cat Candle Holder is both scary and amazingly awesome. He has his bat-cape whirled around him like he…just…don’t…give a flying monkey turd. He knows he’s badass, and now you know it. Whatcha gonna do about it? Well, I’mma put a candle in this thing and let him light up my room. That’s how I roll. Is it a bat or is it a cat? He has the body of a cat, but the attitude of a bat.
Probably plays with string for hours and then goes and hangs upside down for a nap, dropping his guano in his litterbox from the ceiling.
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