I have no idea what the curse of Ezekiel is, but it looks like getting a pair of skeleton handcuffs slapped on you. This Curse of Ezekiel Gothic Bracelet is like having skeleton hands gripping your wrist all day. Get off me. Get off me already. Oh yeah, that’s right, I’m wearing them willingly. It has a good grip. Real sturdy. This guy definitely had his calcium for strong bones. I just wish he would stop digging his nails into me. Do you even own nail clippers?
Tag: bracelet
Classic Monster Cuff Bracelets
Allison Taylor Designs makes these Classic Monster Cuff Bracelets for monster loving wrists. They make all kinds of cool jewelry, but we really dig these. I saw these and I was all like, “I’m here to turn myself over to the jewelry police. Cuff me. I’m guilty.” Okay, so they are more for the ladies. Your point? I think I’m man enough to pull it off. Putting it on is another matter! Okay, that joke fell flat. It was just off the cuff. Not really myself today if I’m honest. Need more coffee so I can be more cuff-einated.
Okay, that joke was totally on the cuff, so I ain’t gettin’ in a huff. Don’t believe me? Wanna call my bluff? Just an idiot with a blog, sayin’ stuff. And now, that’s enough!
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Edgar Allan Poe Nevermore Brass Cuff Bracelet
Yo, where my Poes at? Girls who like Poe, I mean. You ladies are in for a special treat. I’m gonna cuff ya. Sounds kinky I know. It is. I’m gonna cuff you good baby. And just when you think you can’t take anymore, I’ll ask if you want me to stop. Then you’ll shout Nevermore. Don’t stop! Get your mind out of the gutter. I’m talking about this Edgar Allan Poe Nevermore Brass Cuff Bracelet.
Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary…. That’s some pro pros right there from a pro prose writer. Also, that is one sexy bracelet cuff.
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Leather Dragon Eye Bracelets
Check out these Leather Dragon Eye Bracelets from LeasBoutique. They have all kinds of cool bracelets. Soooooo hypnotizing. *Feels sleepy* Yes master. I will wear one on each wrist, then look into the eyes and become one with the dragon spirit. Then I will feel the wrath of the mighty dragon like a storm within me. *Shakes it off and comes to.*
A week later:
Okay, my dragon eye bracelets are here! *Attaches one to each wrist. Crosses wrists like Wonder Woman and locks my eyes with dragon eyes.* That’s strange. Nothing’s happening. What a rip. I mean they’re beautiful and all, but- Oh man. Sudden diarrhea belly. I’m feeling the wrath of the mighty dragon like a storm within me alright. I’ll be back later peeps.
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Roswell 1947 Bracelet
The aliens that crash landed in Roswell New Mexico in 1947 were probably drunk driving. Or texting maybe. Or making sweet love with their fingers like Mr. Spock does. They crashed during a lightning storm. Well, these alien’s misfortune can be your gain. Because you get to own this cool Roswell 1947 Bracelet. The seller says:
The saucer section of this sterling silver bracelet is embedded in a field of many small pieces of metal that have been fused and soldered to the bracelet cuff to simulate earth.
I’m a little bummed at the lack of alien corpses, bongs and beer can debri, but it’s pretty awesome.