Tag: bracelet

Snakeskin Cuff With Snake Head

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Snakeskin Cuffs With Snake Head
This Snakeskin Cuff With Snake Head is perfect if your name is Snake Plisskin or if you are a Cobra Commander. Just leave the head on. Why not? You wear one and I’ll wear one. We can let them slither around our wrists and them slam our wrists together and make them fight until the local ER room has to mend our broken bones.

How’d ya break your wrists?

Uh… We just really suck at high fives. No illegal wrist-snake fights going on here.

Our snake cuffs would be undamaged cuz snakeskin cuffs are snakeskin tough!

Crazy Creature Bangles

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Crazy Creature Bangles
These Crazy Creature Bangles from VoodooDelicious range from cute to creepy. They come in monster, demon and tentacle varieties. I don’t know about you, but I’m always looking down at my wrist and wondering what it would be like to have a monster living on it. Sometimes in my mind, I’m wearing a monster on each wrist and I make them fight by banging them together and making grunting noises.

That’s usually when nice old ladies approach and tell me what a sweet boy I am and ask if I got separated from my mommy. And then mall security arrives and I get carted off to an all-expenses paid trip to the funny place with the medicine. It’s called imagination people. I was too busy fighting monsters to fight them. Which is exactly how they get ya.
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Black Onyx Spider Sterling Silver Cuff Bracelet

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https://www.etsy.com/listing/233727581/black-onyx-spider-sterling-silver?ga_order=price_desc&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=spooky&ref=sr_gallery_21
I hate sliders! I mean spiders! I hate the old Sliders TV show too, but for completely different reasons. I guess I’m dealing with a lot of repressed stuff today for that to come bubbling up to the surface. Spiders always do this to me. Anything on 8 legs stresses me out. *Breathing. Finding a place of zen.*

This Black Onyx Spider Sterling Silver Cuff Bracelet gives me an idea. Everytime I kill a spider, I’m gonna encase it in clear plastic so I can wear a spider ring on every finger. Plus have a spider cuff for each arm. That way when I get to the Boss Spider, I can punch it’s lights out with my spider-fists of fury and block it’s strikes with my cuffs.

On second thought that may have been the end an old Nintendo game.

Apple Watch For Poor People

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apple watch for poor people
Sweet! An Apple watch that I can actually afford! Looks close enough to fool people from like 2 miles away too. I’ll probably still have to upgrade this one every friggin’ year!

The down side is that it breaks super easy, which is okay with me because I can’t even figure how to tell the damn time on it. Maybe one of those genius dudes can explain it to me. You know it’s awesome cuz of how thin it is.
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10 Terrifying And Toothy Items You Can Buy On Etsy

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teeth necklaceTeeth. Why do so many Etsy sellers make things from or about teeth? Why so obsessed? Ya’ll are gross. I said that all southern like to make my point. You guys are just nasty. Click through for a bunch of freaky teeth related Etsy finds that you can really sink your teeth into.
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