These Weird Doll/Animal Hybrid Figures are so f***d up I had to drop my glass of whiskey and get a glass of vodka. What the hell is wrong with you people? Animals and Barbies do not mix! Do you want God to come back and barbecue us all in blazing hellfire? Cuz this is how you get God to come back. Damn twisted Etsy scientists.
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Tag: craft fail
Weird Earbrow Capelet
If you’re looking for a fashion accessory that has ears and eyebrows this Weird Earbrow Capelet is for you. Earbrows are so this season. New from designer Tommy Shillfigure. Or is it Christian Di-ear? I have no idea. I’m not gonna buy. I was just… browsing.
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Devil Child “Heartbreaker” Wearable Art
This is a piece of wearable art that basically has you toting Satan around on your neck as he munches on somebody’s heart. You two can sing duets together.
Don’t go breaking my heart.
I couldn’t if I tried…
or
Give to me your leather.
Take from me, my face…
I’m not sure if they spelled “Heartbraker” wrong on purpose or not, but I am sure that if you walk around, outside of your home with this thing, you are gonna get a one way ticket to loon-town. The crazy house. Pharma mountain. Prozac Palace. The Quacker factory. The nut house. The Cuckoo’s nest. The coma condo.
But if you do wear this thing, take a road trip down south and blast “The Devil went down to Georgia” the whole way. You two will have a ball. Think of it as one last hurrah before the men in white coats arrive.
Crazy Cat Lady Gourd
Being a crazy cat lady is one thing, but put some damn clothes on woman! You can’t just cover your naughty bits with cats! Well you can, but then everyone’s gonna confuse your kitties with your T***ies. Are you on some Hawaiian vacation or is this how you always dress at home? Pull yourself together.Are you out of your gourd?
The Toothpaste Purse
This toothpaste purse is way better than the one I made. That will be $8.39 sir. I think I have some change. Here we go. Never mind all of the goo. That’s just Crest, I promise. It will keep your cash register minty fresh. *Puts toothpaste purse back in my pocket. Sees the gooey white mess all over my pants.* That’s not good. This situation has a police car ride all over it. This is why I never DIY, cuz I DIW(Do It Wrong). No, don’t call the manager. I’ll put the condoms back. See, this isn’t weird at all.