Skull Bedding: Sleep Like The Dead

Skull Bedding Sleep Like The Dead
Check out this cool Skull Bedding. It’s perfect for that big sleep. For sleeping like the dead. For taking a dirt nap. Nah. You’ll be very alive and oh so comfy in this bedding. It has a beautiful design that features a skull and flowers. You put this on your bed and you have a Skully Posturepedic bed. Get it? Put your bones in this bone bedding and you can even bone in it. I’m sorry, that was crude. I should have said shag. No, that’s carpeting. Now I confused myself. F***ing, that’s what I meant!

I have an urge to mess the bed. That didn’t sound right. I mean mess up that pretty bed, by making a blanket fort and calling it Castle Greyskull. It’s gonna be awesome. It already has the cool skull.

The Addams Family Haunted Mansion Print

The Addams Family Haunted Mansion Print
This Addams Family Haunted Mansion Print is based on the famous Disney Haunted Mansion stretch portraits. They’re creepy and they’re kooky. Mysterious and spooky. They’re altogether ooky. The Addams Family. The whole family is here in this cool print.

Fun fact: I’m writing a screenplay for a reboot. The hook? It’s Samuel Adams’ family. They make beer in colonial times and they are monsters. The daughters name is Tuesday instead of Wednesday. I was gonna call her Friday, but she never picked up. *rim shot* So what if I was a little inebriated when I wrote it? Alcohol is my muse. It’s also my mouthwash and my choice of cologne.

Dark Cheshire Cat Hoodie

Dark Cheshire Cat Hoodie
This Dark Cheshire Cat Hoodie is for cattin’ around. Meow! I’mma wear it and create some Malice in Wonderland. I’ll be so proud that I’ll look like the cat that ate the canary. Until someone sees me cough up dark feathers, then they’ll know I ate a Raven. Don’t worry, after that last one I’m saying nevermore! They give me indigestion when I should be full of righteous indignation.

It’s got ribs, ears, eyes, a nose… You ARE the cat. Can I get a meow? I didn’t hear you! I said can I get a meow! Louder people! Laterz. Gotta go practice bathing myself with my tongue. I’mma be that cat for realz!

*Cough* Ack! Ack! *Spits* I taste terrible.

T-Rex Dinosaur Candlesticks

T-Rex Dinosaur Candlesticks
T-Rex Dinosaur Candlesticks. This dinosaur lighting accessory will provide a Jurassic spark to any room. He he he. Jurassic spark. They are made with repurposed painted plastic toys, making them awesome. They look like major awards that you could win for being the coolest dinosaur ever. Which is why I have so many.

Every year a paint a dinosaur gold, walk down my own red carpet, present one to myself and give a teary eyed speech. This year was special. I sawed a donkey in half, spray painted the butt-end gold and gave my self “The ultimate half-ass award” cuz I never do anything all the way.

Universal Monster Postcards

Universal Monster Postcards
Send some monster mail with these Universal Monster Postcards. Cuz you know, monsters are universal. No, really. They are everywhere in the universe. Like Jesus. Even on Mars. I’ve seen the mummies on Mars and let me tell you, they don’t stop until you are dead. Never saw the Invisible Man though. Duh.

Anyway, these postcards are pretty cute representations of the Universal Monsters. All eight are here. Each card is full color and shows these horror icons in humorous scenes. Do you even snail mail bro?

Do the monster mash while sending some monster mail.