I need these Batwing Fan Blades in my belfry. Too bad I don’t have some bats that can hang from these when the fan is off. Cuz then I could turn it on and surprise them. Nah. I would never hurt a bat. You know why you need these fan blades in the summer? Cuz Dra-cool-ya. Get it? Dracula? Bat wings? Cool ya? Wow, tough room. Also, lame joke.
Tag: gift
Horror Hangers – Monsters For Your Wall
UMETOYS makes these cool Horror Hangers that put monsters on your wall. It’s like a bunch of nightmares poking their heads through your wall to see what you’re up to. You can choose from Gill-Man, a bearded zombie, Frankenstein, and a ghost that looks like an old crazy woman. These monsters are gonna look amazing on your wall.
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My God It’s Full Of Skulls Belt Buckle
This Skulls Belt Buckle is pretty appropriate for me to have over my junk cuz it’s like a graveyard down there if ya know what I mean. I get less action than there is on bingo night at an old folks home. It’s all good though… No, it’s not. Dear God, I’m so lonely. I just need some love. Why doesn’t anyone love me? Oh yeah, it’s probably cuz I post weird stuff on the internet every day and chicks just don’t understand. Maybe this belt buckle can turn my game around. Getting rid of the suspenders and bow tie would be a good next step too.
Double Caffeine Zombie Joe Z Bold Coffee
Damn son! Why is that zombie running after me instead of slowly shambling and letting me get away? That’s because the zombies got their hands on a batch of Double Caffeine Zombie Joe Z Bold Coffee. And so can you! If it gets zombies going all day long, it will get you going in the morning too. Zombie Joe! It makes life interesting! *Runs away from zombies at full speed.*
Cheeto Alien In A Tub Figurine With Glowing Water
So that happened. Now you know what it looks like when an alien takes a relaxing bath. It looks like this may be the elusive Cheeto species of alien, so I’m surprised he didn’t dissolve in the water. Anyway, now you can own your very own Alien In A Tub Figurine. The water even glows under a black light. I’m glad his Cheeto alien privates are underwater. I don’t need to be seeing an alien Cheeto d**k! Hmmm. Maybe that’s what a bag of Cheetos is: just a big bag of alien d**ks! Let that sink in.