Gut Instinct Sculpture – Should Have Used Hot Dogs

Gut Instinct Sculpture - Should Have Used Hot Dogs
A piece of weird art like this Gut Instinct Sculpture takes guts man. Real intestinal fortitude. But I mean, it looks like hot dogs. So they should have just used hot dogs. Come to think of it, this thing looks like it’s the patron saint of hot dogs. Our lady of the perpetual weiner. Just needs a hot dog halo and some holy light. By the by, our lady of the perpetual weiner is how I refer to the head prostitute at that place down the road. But I digress.

Holy hot dogs Batman! I guess the artist went with her gut instinct here for real. So yeah, behold the Gut Instinct Sculpture.

Intestines Skater Skirt – IBS – Irritable Bowel Skirt

Intestines Skater Skirt - IBS - Irritable Bowel Skirt
Guts! Do you have the guts to wear this Intestines Skater Skirt? Do you have the intestinal fortitude? Or do you have a cowardly colon? BTW, I have it on good authority that the Cowardly Colon was the original character in the Wizard of Oz, before he was replaced with the cowardly lion. Anyway, this skirt is the ultimate visual representation of Irritable Bowel Syndrome. Well, technically that honor probably belongs to diarrhea, but this is a good one too. IBS. Irritable Bowel Skirt.

Spill Your Guts With The Zombie Babe Corset

Zombie Babe Corset
It takes guts to wear this Zombie Babe Corset. Hey girl, your insides is on your outside. Wanna talk about it? C’mon spill your guts. Oh… Sorry. That was insensitive of me. Where ya going? I can ex-spleen. Damnit! I didn’t mean that. Look, I was just ribbing you. It wasn’t my intestines to make you mad. I really do admire your intestinal fortitude. Oh c’mon. How can I look at this corset and not have this stuff on my mind? It looks pretty. Really it does.

What do you mean you can’t stomach me anymore? Hey! How come you get to say that stuff and I don’t?

It Takes Guts To Wear These Intestine Socks

intestine socksWear your intestines on your feet with these Intestine Socks. This will mess with anyone who has x-ray vision. They will be all like, “My powers must be messed up. Either that or this person has intestines in their legs. They must do a lot of walking to digest their food.”

Intestines will be the big fashion trend this year. I’m never wrong about these things. Except for that time I predicted that pop rocks would join salt and pepper as America’s new favorite seasoning. However that too shall come to pass.

The Anatomy of Yoda

yoda anatomyJudge me by my blood and guts do you? This Yoda anatomy figure puts the Jedi master’s insides on display since you don’t have the power of the Force to use x-ray vision. Sadly, it looks like it is already promised to a buyer.

Just like that doughnut in the shop they wouldn’t let me have yesterday. Shoulda tried to force-lift that tasty morsel into my mouth, but who has the energy for that after downing two doughnuts already? Yeah, my Jedi training on Dagobah would involve a lot of standing still and summoning food my way. I’m a blubber, not a fighter. X-Wing out of a swamp? No thanks. Twinkie out of the box? I WILL return to complete my training.
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