This Gothic Skeleton Wearing A Corset Christmas Tree is *Ru Paul voice* FABULOUS! All I know is Santa better hike that dress up real high and stack the presents tall.
Christmas morning…
*Reaches under the tree to get my presents. Skeleton slaps me for lifting up her dress!* Just trying to get my presents. Damn. That hurts!
It takes guts to wear this Zombie Babe Corset. Hey girl, your insides is on your outside. Wanna talk about it? C’mon spill your guts. Oh… Sorry. That was insensitive of me. Where ya going? I can ex-spleen. Damnit! I didn’t mean that. Look, I was just ribbing you. It wasn’t my intestines to make you mad. I really do admire your intestinal fortitude. Oh c’mon. How can I look at this corset and not have this stuff on my mind? It looks pretty. Really it does.
What do you mean you can’t stomach me anymore? Hey! How come you get to say that stuff and I don’t?
You gotta admire any woman who can pull off a corset of baby hands, all reaching out like the souls of a hundred little money-grubbers, eager to enter this world and make adults broke. You gotta hand it to the Corset Of Exploding Doll Hands, it’s an outfit that would actually keep me away from boobies. And I trigger booby traps regularly just to get a look-see.
It never pans out, but it has booby in the name. They have to contain boobies sooner or later. Then I can win the booby prize, which is probably a pretty buxom and bouncy trophy.
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The Ribcage Hand Tooled Leather Skeleton Corset Belt will make it look like you are getting a permanent X-Ray. Every guy who checks you out will want diagnose you. Can’t be helped. Just trying to be helpful and spot any potential problems.
Can you step in front of that light please? *studies the ribs* Hmmmm. Interesting. *calls another guy over* What do you think of that? I agree, that could be a problem. Now get out of here. I need some alone time with the patient. I suggest we operate right away, because I’m a smooth operator. Surgeon? No, I’m no surgeon honey. I thought you said, “Sir, gin”. So, where’s my gin? Nevermind. I’ll have to operate quickly, making it as painless as possible. You other guys can watch and learn. *Clears throat* Well, hello there. Can I have your number? See, you’ve got my heart all locked up in your ribcage. I think we can sort this out by getting together this Saturday night. *Wiggles eyebrows*
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I’m rubber, you’re glue. Whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you. Which is good for you since then you’ll have an awesome gooey glue corset to wear. Remember being a kid and putting glue all over your hands? Letting it dry and then peeling it off like you were a lizard shedding it’s skin? Maybe that was just me. I was a special kid. I spent hours peeling that junk off while flicking my tongue and hissing. Needless to say, snakeboy never lasted long at any one school.
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