Before we get into these Black raven Brooches, I have to brooch the subject. That subject? Ravens. Also, I witnessed a murder guys. A murder of ravens. It’s a murder of crows you idiot! Shut up! You don’t know what I murdered. Oops! This doesn’t count as a confession does it? I think you might be right. They were crows. How many did you murder? Not sure. I’ll need to enlist the help of a band to find out. Huh? Counting crows… I hate you! Really? Every else is raven about me! Kill me!
Tag: jewelry
Gold Day of the Dead Sugar Skull Necklace
This is one shiny Day of the Dead Sugar Skull Necklace. Bling bling motha truckas! I’m offended cuz I’m a mother who is also a trucker! Oh well ya can’t please everyone. There are more offended people these days then you can shake a dead cat at. I’m calling PETA! Please do, I love their bread. You bastard! Is that a comment about my yeast infection? You woman hating freak. And also, you’re racist. Everybody just calm down. I just wanted to show you this sweet necklace. Damn. Everyone just needs to calm the eff down.
Goat Sucker! – Silver Chupacabra Necklace
Wear this Silver Chupacabra Necklace in honor of the world’s most famous goat sucker. Unlike the Chupacabra itself, this necklace does not suck. He’s in a sweet action pose like he’s about to pounce on his prey. Or at least just dive in a dumpster and snag half a big-mac. Hey, you gotta eat. So shiny. So deadly. So full of the blood of goats.
Victorian Edgar Allan Poe Necklace With Ravens
Check out this Edgar Allan Poe Necklace. It’s got Edgar front and center, naturally. It also has some ravens and a skull. Do you own one already? Then you’ve been Poe-owned son! Get it? Powned? Whatevs, you know that was hilarious. Poe-lease I know you laughed. Seriously though, this is a sweet ass necklace. Your other necklaces will be worn…. Wait for it… Nevermore!
Tortured Souls Rings – Agonizing Accessories
Does wearing Tortured Souls Rings make you the devil? I have no idea. That’s one for a philosopher. What I do know is that if you wear a handful of these and start punching people, you are making tortured souls create other tortured souls and that’s pretty evil. Don’t do that. Just wear them and admire their torment if you’re into that kind of thing. That reminds me, my feet are hurting. I think it’s cuz I have some tortured soles in my shoes. Wait. I AM the tortured soul in my shoes. Man, that’s deep.