Tag: keys

Frankenstein Hand Wall Hook or Guitar Hanger

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Frankenstein Hand Wall Hook or Guitar Hanger
Everybody give a hand to the Frankenstein Hand Wall Hook or Guitar Hanger! *Crowd goes wild* Pretty handy. I’d read his palm, but I would have him in stitches. I have a million of ’em. Like this one:

What do you say when Dr. Frankenstein creates a pile of smokey goo instead of a re-animated monster? Then leaves it sit overnight smelling rotten? *Clears throat* I say, “To the Victor go the spoils…” Get it? Ha ha ha ha ha. Cuz his name is Victor and it is spoiled! Man, I crack myself up. Mostly cuz I’m on crack, but I’mma pretty funny dude too.

Wood Coffin Keychains

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Wood Coffin Keychains
These Wood Coffin Keychains are perfect for your car keys. If you drive a hearse. Also perfect for your house keys. If you live in a funeral home. Better “dead” bolt that door once you get inside though. Also perfect for those keys that you have that are no longer useful. In other words, keys that are dead to you. Ha. I could go on all day, but I’m late for therapy. Once I showed up and it was shock therapy. Cuz the therapist was so shocked I got there on time.

Star Wars Lightsaber House Keys

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light saber key cover
These Star Wars Lightsaber keys would totally destroy you plain old house key in a fight. *Makes cool lightsaber sounds* Pretty awesome. But WTF? You have to train in a swamp just to learn Jedi powers? What is Yoda gonna make me do to earn a friggin’ Lightsaber key? I suppose I have to do fancy Jedi moves around my neighborhood with him on my back!

Not enough it is to feel the force. You must use the force to pick up this dog doody. *concentrates as dog doody hovers in mid-air* Good very good. Higher it must go. Feel the force flow through the doody. You and the doody are one. Feel it’s corn. Be one with the stink. Higher still, you must lift it. Good. Now drop the doody in that chimney, you must!

WTF Yoda?

Judged me by my size, that one did. Know where he lives, I do. Pay now, he will!