Tag: odd

Plague Doctor Lamp – Adorable Ambience

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Plague Doctor Lamp - Adorable Ambience

Plague doctor, plague doctor what’s all the fuss? Been waiting for 4 hours, draining out the pus. P doctor, where you been? 50 in the graveyard and more to go in. That’s a little song. Let’s just call that in progress. Anywho, check out this creepy and cool Plague Doctor Lamp. Isn’t that little guy adorable? He’s reading by lantern light. Probably brushing up on his bedside manner or something. Not that he needs to. This guy is cute as hell and you’ll feel better just knowing that he’s on the case.

He just makes me smile. This Plague Doctor Lamp is the perfect light to read by and if you feel ill, well the doctor is in. You can choose from several different lamp colors. It pairs well with this Plague Doctor Doll. I’m obsessed with both.

Mushroom Skeleton Art Doll – Macabre Mycelium

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Mushroom Skeleton Art Doll - Macabre Mycelium

I think I saw something like this Mushroom Skeleton Art Doll once when I was trippin’ balls. It taught me the ways of the forest and had me eat all of it’s friends. Man, I spent a year in the forest that weekend. Look at this gal with her deathly bonnet. This is what Tim Burton’s Little House on the Prairie looks like. Growing in the shade of a tree, just waiting for something to pass by so she can be all deadly.

Unlike these skull mushrooms, this Mushroom Skeleton Art Doll is deadly cute. Dare I say sexy? We would get along good, cuz I’m also a fun-guy. Did I hear one of you groan at that joke? Oh spore me! Like you could do better. Mycelium is better than your-celium.

Bloody Pearl Necklace Choker

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Bloody Pearl Necklace Choker

For the refined lady with a touch of darkness. I present to you the Bloody Pearl Necklace Choker. You are refined and intelligent, regal. But you long for the vampire’s breath gently caressing your neck, suddenly growing hot as he bares his teeth and goes in for the bite. At first, the pain is unbearable, but quickly becomes ecstatic. Your essence rushes out, pumped by his lustful need- Oh shizz, I was saying that out loud as I typed and now everyone at the library is looking at me. Hey, it’s where I write sometimes. That librarian must have dry lips. She keeps licking them as she watches me. Get some ChapStick freak!

Anyway, if you crave the excitement of vampiric exsanguination, but lack either a nearby vampire or good looks, this Bloody Pearl Necklace Choker is the next best thing. Look at that sophisticated and stylish splatter. Sexy! Now that’s a necklace!

The Shining Pizza Cutter – Here’s Johnny!

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

The Shining Pizza Cutter - Here's Johnny!

It would have been a whole different movie if Jack Torrance had this The Shining Pizza Cutter. For one thing he never would have busted the door down with this thing, but if he did manage to get in, he would have sliced up your pizza to perfection. See, he’s not such a bad guy. Here’s Johnny. And here’s your once beautiful pizza pie, all sliced and diced and in a million pieces.

The Shining Pizza Cutter. It even has the famous quote on the handle. On the other side is the movie logo. All work and no pizza makes Jack a dull boy. Hey, when you don’t have pizza, you get hungry. Hungry leads to hangry and hangry leads to you going a little off the rails. It happens. I wouldn’t try to slice this Nightmare on Elm Street Animated Soul Pizza though.

Gothic Raven Purse – For The Birds

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Gothic Raven Purse - For The Birds

Wow. Now that’s a nice looking bag. That’s not just something they say in the bathhouse, it’s what they’ll say about this purse when you wear it. This Gothic Raven Purse is stunning. You might even say ravenous. I know I’m raven about it. You won’t catch me crowing about it though. That would be mixing my bird metaphors. Did you know that a group of ravens is known as an “unkindness”. Man, these birds have a bad reputation. But they look awesome on this Gothic Raven Purse accessory. Get your claws on one today!

I’ll have to write that fun fact down in my Raven Journal. It’s where I keep all of my raven related thoughts and dreams from prying eyes and nosy beaks. Did you know that they remember human faces? Come to think of it, that would explain why my car gets pooped on so damn often. Now that’s an unkindness. It’s downright rude. You point and laugh one time when a baby bird can’t get the worm and it makes you a lifelong poop target.