The Haunted Cat Tarot Deck

The Haunted Cat Tarot Deck

Look at that artwork. MoewZers! Let me introduce you to The Haunted Cat Tarot Deck featuring the amazing art of J Edward Neill. This 78 card deck is just full of, well, haunted cats. Just like my house. I have so many deceased cats in my yard, all missed terribly) and I see their little ghosts all of the time. 78 cards huh? Lets see, that’s… What’s 78 divided by 9 lives? Ah. 8.6. That’s enough tarot card reading for 8.6 cat lives, which roughly equates to not quite 9 readings as each cat has nine lives. Hmmm. I’m seeing a serious flaw here. If a cat is getting a reading, the cat can almost get that last full reading, but not quite. The Haunted Cat Tarot Deck needs more cards. Yes. That’s what my scientific equation states.

I’ll have to run my calculations on these other tarot cards.

 

Creepy Garden Skull

Creepy Garden Skull

I don’t know about you, but sometimes people dig in their garden and they find some bones. It’s scary as hell. I just want to tend to my roses, not be a part of some investigation. Anyway, this Creepy Garden Skull is perfect if you actually want to creep up the garden. Just drop it among your flowers and your garden bed instantly becomes a lot cooler. I beg your pardon, I never promised you a skull garden…

It looks pretty authentic too. You know what they call that shocked feeling when you find a skull in your yard. Skully-osis. I’m pretty sure. I know about stuff like that. Just set this Creepy Garden Skull in your garden and then sit back and watch the neighbors talk. It’s fun. Speaking of cool garden and home accessories that are on the dark side, these Stained Glass Ravens are pretty sweet too.

Bat & Coffin Toilet Paper Holders

Bat & Coffin Toilet Paper Holders

These Bat & Coffin Toilet Paper Holders will scare the s**t out of you, but the good news is that you have plenty of TP. This decor is the best way to take a creepy caca. Or a great guano. You know, what bats do. You can choose one or buy both. You’d have to be batty to not buy these awesome Bat & Coffin Toilet Paper Holders.

They will look amazing with these Gothic Bat Hand Towels if you have a bat theme. And who doesn’t? You have to have bats in your belfry. You just have to. Bats are cool! Now for a little song. *clears throat* The bats in the Belfast belfry had a bewildered and bedazzled breakfast break before Brian the brainiest began breaking bad before a beleaguered and big breasted basilisk in a busted bra bragged and belittled the bastid!

Ok. that was not so much a song as it was the mating call of a mentally ill writer. But hey, that’s a lot of B words. I have a great vocabulary. The point is that I need these pieces of bat decor in my life. It’s called the bat room not the bathroom. Deal with it.

Cryptid Field Sketchbook

Cryptid Field Sketchbook

Ever been out in the field, when you spot the Jersey devil and you can’t even draw him cuz you left your sketchbook at home? We’ve all been there. Well, now you can get this Cryptid Field Sketchbook with drawing of cryptids already in it. I tried to draw Mothman once. The 2 wings just looked like a heart with a head attached. This cool Cryptid Field Sketchbook features creatures like the Ohio Grassman, the Flatwoods Monster, Jersey Devil, Mothman and many many more.

This is a much safer way to view cryptids. So you don’t have to worry about getting killed by an angry monster while simultaneously sketching. This sketchbook is full of awesome artwork. Just like these Cryptid Tarot Cards.

Krampus Deluxe 7-Inch Action Figure

Krampus Deluxe 7-Inch Action Figure

Holy Krampus. I always wanted my very own Krampus Deluxe 7-Inch Action Figure. Now I can get one for my very own. Look at this guy. The ancient demonic force from the 2015 spooky Christmas film is looking scary indeed. Use it for your holiday horror display or year round. There’s no wrong way to display this terror. He also comes with plenty of cool accessories. To be honest, this looks like me before my first cup of coffee. Have your self a terrifying Christmas. Oh yes, you will.

I mean I already pack a 6 inch Krampus, if know what I mean ladies. I might as well get a Krampus Deluxe 7-Inch Action Figure. Just for bragging rights you know. Although its not the size of the Krampus, it’s how you display him for the holidays. Also check out this Krampus Holiday Cards Set. Send a card to me. I’m lonely. Sigh. But at least I have old Krampy here. He never lets me down. He scares the hell out of me, but he never lets me down. Old Krampy. Haha. That’s what I used to call my exe wife once a month. i wonder why she left me.