Ohhhh toast of the Zombie! I’ll have mine with extra butter. Crisp, but not too crisp. Just a light smear of jelly on top just like my pap use to give me. In other words just a pap smear! Ewwww. I’m so wrong! I’m so gross! Get over it cupcake! This Toast of the Zombie Goblet Set lets the Zombie hands make a toast for you. Cuz everything is classier with Zombie hands. I said so!
Tag: set
Twisted Toyland Tarot Cards
Twisted Toyland. Sounds like an adult sex shop. Deal me in! Nah. Just a cool set of tarot cards so some gypsy can tell your future. And that future is gonna involve some insane and demented toys. The Twisted Toyland Tarot Cards set is a 22 Card Major Arcana Tarot Deck. Who gives a reading with these cards? They’re all like, “I’ll charge you a hundred bucks to introduce you to the most demented toybox ever.” I’d be like, no thanks, cuz I had the most foul and darkest and most twisted toy box ever when I was a kid. But that’s only cuz I pooped in it(foul), my mom painted it black(darkest) and my dad was a sh*t carpenter(wood was all twisted).
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Custom Horror Hand Towels
Until I saw these, I thought I was the king of Custom Horror Hand Towels. Of course mine were created by neglect and never washing them. And lots and lots of mold. These are much nicer. They feature embroidered images of Michael Myers, Jason, Freddy Krueger and The Shining. The real horror is germs people. Don’t be like me. Man,I can’t wait to wipe my hands on Freddy’s smug face. I’m so sick of that guy invading my dreams.
Universal Monsters Prayer Candle Set
Really enjoying my Universal Monsters Prayer Candle Set. Every night I light these bad boys and pray. Dear God, please don’t let Frankenstein’s monster find my house. Or his wife. Please don’t let the mummy invade my dreams and suffocate me by wrapping me in his bandages while he turns into my doppelganger and lives my life. Just keep me safe k? Thanks.
Zombie Friendship Keychains – Apocalypse Partners
Freddy Mercury said it best. Friends will be friends… Kind of obvious in retrospect, but there you have it. Friends are friends. Right till the end. Sometimes that end is a zombie apocalypse, with you shooting your friend in the head because your BFF is a dirty rotten zombie. That’s the way it goes. Doesn’t mean you aren’t friends. Just means you don’t want them eating your brain. Anyway, this Zombie Friendship Keychains set signifies that you and your BFF are zombie apocalypse partners and that you vow to do whatever it takes when the zombies roam the streets. Even if that thing is splitting up and running when you see the undead.
Even though it means that you will never find each other again, while you live a harsh life of survival, doing whatever you have to to get by, so that 5 years later your shaggy bearded self checks the zombie traps you set (the ones where they step on a trigger and a blade swings down, chopping their heads off) only to find a headless zombie body and the other half of your keychain in its pocket.
*Tears* So sad. Still friends. But so sad.