Few things in this life are as powerful and hefty as Donald Trump’s combover. Whether you are a Trump supporter or detractor, you can now own a pair of shoes that are seemingly inspired by The Donald’s hair. Gucci’s new Princetown Goat-Hair Mules are just… WTF. I don’t even know what to say about them. They cost $1,800, but if you are the kind of person wearing these, your therapist will cost a lot more. How did I know you had a therapist? Well, if you like these shoes, you need one. That’s for sure. It looks like you stepped on a pair of tribbles.
Read more “These Shoes Look Like Donald Trump’s Combover”
Author: Artemis Winterford
Universal Monster Postcards
Send some monster mail with these Universal Monster Postcards. Cuz you know, monsters are universal. No, really. They are everywhere in the universe. Like Jesus. Even on Mars. I’ve seen the mummies on Mars and let me tell you, they don’t stop until you are dead. Never saw the Invisible Man though. Duh.
Anyway, these postcards are pretty cute representations of the Universal Monsters. All eight are here. Each card is full color and shows these horror icons in humorous scenes. Do you even snail mail bro?
Do the monster mash while sending some monster mail.
Marilyn Manson Inspired Lipstick Set
At last you can have the lips of Marilyn Manson without having to rip them off him and paste them onto your own. You know that’s wrong don’t you? Glad we had this talk. Don’t do that!
These are some scary-ass goth lips right here. Chomping down of the actual lipstick with your teeth is apparently required if you wanna rock these colors. I don’t like that “Hollywood” color. Makes it look like you’ve been kissing somebody’s butt and guess what? They didn’t wipe. Well they did, it was just on your lips. Probably that color because everyone kisses ass in Hollywood. I would choose Mansinthe because I personally like my lips to look like an irradiated lime. But that’s just me.
Vincent Van Gogh Plush Doll With Removable Ear
Give yourself the gift of Van Gogh, one of history’s greatest painters. Then give the one you love Van Gogh’s ear. Just like Van Gogh did. Thanks to this Vincent Van Gogh Plush Doll With Removable Ear. You don’t have to be stark raving mad to cut off your ear and send it to the woman you love. But it helps.
Say what you want about Vincent. He would always lend you his ear. Can you “ear” me Vincent? Oh that’s your bad side. Sorry. Oh well, you know what they say. Ear today, gone tomorrow. Vincent Van Gogh? More like Vincent Van Gone Deaf on one side.
Man, I hope that chick at least gave him a little something for cutting his damn ear off. If not, that’s just cold.
via Ohgizmo
H.P. Lovecraft Bust
This H.P. Lovecraft Bust is pretty busty. I mean, not as busty as that lady I accidentally bumped into at the supermarket, who saved my life with her giant bazoomba airbags but still. This bust will look good in your home. Maybe you can use it on that altar where you try and summon Cthulhu every night. Yeah, I know what you get up to when I’m not around. That’s dangerous bidness peeps.
Funny story. I once tried to do the same thing. I was all like, “May the many tentacle-headed beast rise again and cleanse the world in blood and fire!” It took me a week to get rid of Predator AND Evil Bob Marley. Apparently the other side heard tentacle-headed and thought that meant dreadlocks. I need to be more specific.