If you own property in the Valley of The Dolls or on the Island of Dolls, decorate your place with some appropriate lighting. Lighting that makes it look like one of your dolls has been possessed and is burning hell’s fiery furnace behind it’s eyes. It is only 99 cents with 3 days to go on Ebay.
Have fun with that. Don’t blame me when that head spins 360 degrees and starts spitting vomit everywhere. Check it out all lit up and evil below.
Read more “Interior Frighting: Creepy Doll Head Lamp”
Well, what can you say about the $185. “black tar fetus sculpture”? This poor guy was tarred, but interestingly, not feathered. Luckily for him, the tarring made a sweet superhero-type mask on his face, even if it is burned into his flesh.
And that is how an average fetus became…The Feto-Bandito! Fighting for truth, justice and anti-tarring everywhere. Here we see his final moments, when his arch enemy defeated him with more tar and some syringes. Here he utters his final words, “Feto-Bandito..*cough-cough*..is…finito!”
It is a sad hero whose origin story is also his death story.
What the hell is this thing? Some weird taxidermy monkey I guess. Maybe a baby bigfoot? Nah, if it was a baby bigfoot, the images would be all blurry and the voice in my head would have called bulls*it! But what does he know? Anyhow, this funky monkey is kinda cute. Thankfully he is no longer alive to transmit epidemic monkey viruses and such.
The seller had it listed for $395 or best offer on eBay. Sadly it sold before I could offer $2.59 in change and a lifesaver with cat hair and couch fabric embedded in it. If someone got this for 3 bucks, I’ll be mighty pissed off, because my next offer was to include the removal of said cat hair and couch fabric from the lifesaver. My calculations make this offer worth at least 3 bucks. Those watermelon lifesavers kick ass! I really gotta start upping my bids and offers.
More images below.
Read more “Dead Stuff: Bizarre Monkey Taxidermy”
Where Unicorns are sweet and magical and rainbow bright, and all about chasing virgins and pooping skittles, the Unicorn Rat is all about hanging on your wall and looking like an evil overlord.
His eyes will follow you wherever you go and he will shoot magical dark rays from his horn which make you do his bidding. (Things like making you dance in your underwear on a carpet of spring-loaded rat traps, while rubbing hot sauce all over your body. Yeah, he’s sick like that!) He is surrounded by glass bubbles of evil as if he is just now breaking into our plain of existence. Beware the Unicorn Rat. And whatever you do, DO NOT feed it.
Check out more images below.
Read more “Dead Unicorn Rat Surrounded By Bubbles”
This sticker will come in very handy at the office. And it will help with my pending sexual harassment case. Which I can’t talk about. I can say that it was already on the door and she had fair warning. I am so going to skate free of that charge!
Note to self. Still have to hire a new secretary.