Category: Creep Wear

Rainbow Hologram Alien Backpack

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Rainbow Hologram Alien Backpack
This Rainbow Hologram Alien Backpack is all shiny and holographic. It’s the future. I already had a gypsy foretell this: It is the future. The world is a barren waste. Those that survive are butt-hurt due to the experiments of the alien invaders. Humans are enslaved with alien heads on their back. You alone will save the world. She also predicted that I would tip her well and she was right. I had board game money, she had no eyesight. It was like a match made in heaven. This etsy listing means that the time is upon us.

*Sees giant rainbow alien head floating into my room at night.* ARHHHHHHH! What do you want? No, not again! *Lights go on.* Just my stupid roommate wearing this backpack as he backs into the room. NOT COOL!

Amazingly Creepy Clutch Bags

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Amazingly Creepy Clutch Bags
Looking for a new clutch ladies? If so, can I interest you in these Amazingly Creepy Clutch Bags? By the way, if you’re looking for a Klutz, I just spilled my drink all over the counter and dropped M and M’s all over the place. Better get me while I’m still single. *Winks* These clutch bags are all so spooky and creepy, I thought I heard a witch cackle and the bubbling of a cauldron. But that was probably the crazy cat lady that lives next door. Great she’s watching a comedy and cooking a pot of chili. Again. The walls here are paper thin. Better get the gas mask since we also share a vent.

These clutch bags all have fun and spooky designs like bats, spiders and cemeteries.
Read more “Amazingly Creepy Clutch Bags”

Creepy Glowing Alien Visitor Pendant

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Creepy Glowing Alien Visitor Pendant
This Alien Visitor Pendant reminds me of those alien lizards from “V” who pretended to be human with fake skin and stuff. It’s cool, we unmasked them on live TV and exposed them. Go take somebody else’s water and use other humans for food you crazy space geckos. Is it just me or does this guy look pissed off? He’s pretty butt-hurt, which is funny considering all the probing they do to humans. It’s about time you got some of your own.

Also, check out how cool this thing looks when it glows. He’s revealing his natural green color. Of course I guess that could be the afterglow from alien sex.

UFO’s in flight…Afternoon delight!

Unless he’s just green with envy, cuz everybody else is gettin’ some. I feel ya dog. Fist bump me. Sorry, forgot you were just a head. *Hits a knuckle to your forehead.* Intergalactic women. Who needs em? Alien bros before hos am I right? Oh, stop being grumpy. See, this is why the ladies don’t dig ya.
Creepy Glowing Alien Visitor Pendant

Skeleton X-Ray Cat Necklace

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Skeleton X-Ray Cat Necklace
Meow! Meow! Rubs up on your legs, showing off my insides while I put my bony cat-butt in your face. This cool Skeleton X-Ray Cat Necklace shows off the cat’s anatomy so you can get a look at it’s insides. This cat has guts, I’ll give it that. It even has a mouse in there that it just ate. Did someone have yum-yums? Was that you? Who’s the cute kitty with his insides showing? It’s you. Yes it is. *Scratches it under the chin*

BakuForestStudios has several x-ray animal necklaces to choose from. Pretty cool. Pretty cool. I wish I had a cool skeleton cat to pal around with.

Charlotte’s Web Talisman Necklace With Real Spider Web

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Charlotte's Web Talisman Necklace With Real Spider Web
Check out these Charlotte’s Web Talisman Necklaces With Real Spider Webs. That’s how you get creepy and nasty insects to work for you. Although I asked for my name to be spelled out like three times already and it still looks like a kindergartner with a caffeine addiction. Hell, I could have done that myself and I don’t spin webs out of my butt, but I do wrap up my food in little saran-wrap cocoons super fast using just my front legs. Hey, I dig freshness. That pot roast I cooked last night is fresh as funky beats. It’s gonna stay that way!