Category: Creep Wear

Black Bat Gemstone Pendant

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Black Bat Gemstone Pendant
This Black Bat Gemstone Pendant looks pretty awesome. Give it as a gift to someone you are batty about. It is so classy and so batty that I’m squealing like a bat. Really I am, you just can’t hear me. You also can’t smell that fresh load of guano I just unleashed cuz I was so excited and couldn’t contain my bat-bowels. No worries, I promise to re-enact the whole thing when this blog goes VR and smell-o-vision, which will probably be about 2025. Wooo-hooo! I have at least that long to go without deodorant before anyone notices. Hey, why do all the house plants keep dying? Just one of life’s mysteries I guess.

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Scary Sexy Bat Hair Bow Clip Is So Sexy

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Scary Sexy Bat Hair Bow ClipI love a girl with bats in her belfry. Crabs in her crabshack, not so much cuz you need special creams and stuff to stop the itching. But yeah, this Bat Hair Bow Clip looks sexy. Like you are a servant of some vampire. I’ll let ya bite my neck just as long as you leave a hickey, so everyone can see proof that I scored or almost scored. And that moment when you grab this bat hair bow and let it loose? Letting your hair flow down as you shake it free? Oh man. I am so turned on right now. Then the bat will fly off and we will live happily ever after. You’ll nag me about my healthy eating of course and my drinking at 5 AM, and the donuts, not to mention the fact that I just lay there scratching and farting and don’t look for a job, but I know we are going to be so happy together. That’s why I got you this ring. I love you. Was that too soon? Should I have waited?

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Nasty Sexy Chest One Piece Swimsuit

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Sexy Chest One Piece Swimsuit
Damn, that’s one sexy chest! Not! *Vomits for 10 minutes straight.* This Sexy Chest One Piece Swimsuit will transform you ladies into something hideous, but this is what some of us look like at the beach already. I should probably sue for copyright infringement because they totally just copied my nasty man body. These come in three skin tones and all are horrifying. That photoshop above gives you some idea. This is nastier than that Guts Swimsuit.

Gothic Spider Web Pencil Skirt For Black Widows

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Gothic Spider Web Pencil Skirt
You’re looking good in that Gothic Spider Web Pencil Skirt girl, but you know what it’s missing? Me. Along came a spider and sat down beside her. *Sits down next to you* What do ya say you and I roll around in that web and make a little cocoon? You’re not a Black Widow are ya? Not gonna bite my head off after? How about I bite your head off before and do the world a favor? Fair enough. I like that girl in the Spider Web Cardigan better anyway. Laterz.

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Vampire Skull Cameo Brooch Pendant

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Vampire Skull Cameo Brooch Pendant
Wear this Vampire Skull Cameo Brooch Pendant cuz it looks badass. That’s the only reason really. Dude looks like he got shot in the head and is still going strong. He’s also missing an eye. He has had a very bad day. He’s got a spider on his head too. You are going to look creepy and cool wearing this. Check out the cat skull brooch too.

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