Joker Crafts: Batman The Dark Knight Journal

Batman The Dark Knight JournalThis Batman: The Dark Knight Journal looks like it was made by the Joker himself. It’s so nice that Arkham Asylum provides its guests with arts and crafts projects. You can write all of your deepest darkest desires in this fun journal as well as contemplate any of life’s burning questions. Like, “Why so serious?”

And if you are crazy enough, you might open it up later to find that someone else has answered your question. In your handwriting.
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Scary Superhero Nutcrackers

nutcrackerSuperheros are all about cracking down on crime and that means cracking bad guy nuts when they have too. So superhero nutcrackers make a whole lot of sense.

These nutcrackers from Etsy seller ARTBYBART are pretty scary looking. And the all have balls for fists. I see a freaky nut/ball pattern here. Not saying this guy has peen on his mind, just saying it seems weird because I obviously have it on my mind. Let’s just leave it there. I got more issues than DC and Marvel combined. You don’t want to be flippin’ through the pages!

Click through for more, including the Joker, Wonder Woman and Optimus Prime.
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Oh Gnome They Didn’t: Superhero Gnomes

gnomesEveryone knows that red hatted Gnomes are up to no good. They might scare critters away from your garden, but you know they get up to all kinds of mischief when you aren’t looking. Your garden needs some Superhero power.

For $74.99 on Etsy, you can get a Bat Gnome, Super Gnome and Captain Gnomerica. These guys will protect your garden from everything and they will beat those red hatted gnome types into the dirt.

Lifesize Uma Thurman Mannequin Wearing Poison Ivy Costume

Poison Ivy Batman and Robin costumeBatman and Robin. That was a terrible Batman movie. Luckily it did have Uma Thurman as Poison Ivy. I would rub up on those vines and get a seven year itch. You know what I’m sayin’? Reminds me of that time (the only time) a girl came over to my house wearing a sexy Poison Ivy costume. She was covered in actual Poison Ivy. She was all like, “I’m just wearing this so you won’t touch me, perv! I’m only here because you have an Xbox.”

Anywho. Do you want a life sized Uma Thurman doll wearing the Poison Ivy costume? Ebay seller gvmdesigns has one for you for 5 grand. Oh man, give me just one night with her and it would be worth the year long calamine lotion baths and blistery lesions all over my body. Mind if I climb that Ivy tower madame?

More images below, including a weird one where she has a canine sidekick.
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Jabba The Hutt Barfing Fine Art Print

Jabba The Hutt PukingYeah, this will happen when you eat one too many space frogs after partying all night in your palace and betting on Rancor fights. Star Wars fans who enjoy seeing the fattest thing in the Star Wars universe puking his guts out, will want to hang this fine art print in a prominent place in their home. It’s only $17. Maybe you can put it next to that Star Wars: Jesus Dress Up toy that you have displayed.

Just an observation, but, there is no way that toilet is supporting his big fat Hutt ass.

Etsy seller LegendaryTigerHero has all kinds of other weird and awesome art prints too. Click through for a bonus Batman puking his guts out.
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