Turkey Man is a superhuman turkey created in an experiment at the Perdue labs in 1976. He flew the coop and went on the run, living off the grid and saving humans in danger, ultimately becoming the hero and savior of Chick-tropolis, where he battled such foes as the Hob-Gobbler, Bizarro Colonel Sanders and both Frank and Jim Perdue. His good deeds earned him a presidential pardon on Thanksgiving of 1986. Now you can look just like this awesome hero and maybe even ruffle a few villainous feathers.
Tag: superhero
Geeky Coffin Boxes
nightmaresknickknack offers all kinds of cool and geeky coffins covered in superheroes and stuff. I’m gonna put my action figures in these, because I’m a morbid nerd like that. Oh Superman. *tears* We thought nothing could kill you. *sniff* Oh hi Lois Lane. What a lovely service. Yes he was a brave man. We shall never see his like again. Can I get your number? Buzz off? Cool. *Returns with nerd glasses on.* That guy was such a douche. Can I have your number? Cool. I’m definitely not the same guy.
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Leather Bug-Eyed Alien Mask
The BUG-EYED MAN is in your town. He’s on the sides of your buildings. He’s landing on your delicious picnic meal, then rubbing his butt in it as his tongue flicks all crazy like. He just spent like five minutes on a steaming pile of poo, soaking up the sun and the germs like he was in a four star resort and now he has landed on your skin, knocking you to the ground because this is a man sized freak! And totally not hygienic!
Yeah, that’s how it would be if I got this Leather Bug-Eyed Alien Mask. I could finally be a proper public menace and not just an internet menace. It is my destiny!
Awesome Garden Gnomes Look Like Your Favorite Geek Characters
Etsy seller ianthegnome makes all kinds of crazy garden gnomes that look like superheroes, wrestlers, video game characters. You name it. Okay, I will. I name it awesome. Check out a bunch below and then go crazy ordering them for your yard. I call dibs on Superman and Batman cuz I’m creating my own gnome Justice League.
You can have Dexter and his cellophane wrapped victim. Gizmo too. No way I’m putting a Mogwai in my garden. You know he’s gonna get wet and multiply into a s**t ton of evil Gremlins that are going to break everything, eat everything and cause nothing but trouble. In other words, another me. One of me is plenty. I refuse to share my junk food and there’s not much left in my house that I haven’t broken already.
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Batman And Superman On The Toilet Art Prints
Hey, Superheroes poop too. Superman’s poop just has the ability to break your toilet into a million shards if he loses bowel control. They don’t call him The Man Of Stool for nothin’! Batman’s poop? Smells dark and brooding. Recedes into dark corners.
These fine art prints will show you that DC Comics’ finest are just like you and me. They have poop inside of them and it needs to get out. Sometimes you have to have a good read while you are waiting. Do you want one of these prints? Of course, you do. Does Poison Ivy poop in the garden?
You can get both of them for $32. from Etsy.