Whoa! My inner nerd just got wood. Or it would have if my inner nerd didn’t already have erectile dysfunction. This is a custom Demogorgon Stranger Things Action Figure based on the Netflix Stranger Things series. Man, this figure cranks things up to eleven. See what I did there?
I would buy it, but it would just eat all of my other action figures. Pretty damn cool though. HEY! LEGO MY EGGO Eleven. Netflix and chill the f**k out! I love those waffles.
Thanks Jennifer.
I always wanted to snuggle up with a Xenomorph on a cold winter night. Then I got married and I have all the horror I could ever want from a cuddle partner. I kid. I kid. She reads this blog. This Alien Xenomorph Custom Plush will either kill you or cuddle you. Your chances are 50/50. Don’t be fooled by his cuteness. It takes 3-4 weeks for delivery, because they have to hatch this guy, incubate him, give him a lust for blood etc.
Alien heads! These Custom Alien Head Magnets finally allow me to collect alien heads in a way that DOES NOT involve chopping their filthy heads off whenever they try to abduct me and take me aboard their spaceships for tests.
Later that night at 3 A.M.
*Stands over a decapitated alien body, breathing heavy, with a machete in my hand.* “I told you, I don’t need a checkup! Now contemplate your dead-side manner you gray bastard!”
Holy cheesy Cheetos Batman! This Cheetos Demon Horror Doll eats to live and lives to eat. I guess you really are what you eat. Check out his little Cheeto pocket on his chest. I think I have that same outfit. *Looks down* I’m wearing it now! *Reaches for Cheetos. Om nom nom nom!* It makes sense that a Cheeto demon baby would prefer the Flamin’ Hot flavor! Me too!
*Keeps eating Cheeetos* Oh shizz! My skin is turning orange too. I’m a Cheeto demon nightmare! Wait. Nevermind. My skins been that way for years. It’s coated with the dust of a million snacks. Just like this guy. Hello brotha from anotha cheesy snack motha!
Garbage Pail Saints. They’re holier than Garbage pail Kids and all religious-y. Garbage Pail Saints! The Pope probably collects them and puts them in sleeves in his palace while a servant is trimming his holiness’ toenails with his teeth and swallowing every one. The Catholic church is whack yo. You can get a whole pack of these cards. I’m gonna collect the hell out of these. And by the way people, stop tossing your kids and saints in the garbage. I mean, it makes for fun cards and all, but seriously.
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